A+, meanie

Hope

Wonwoo

"You could have kept up, if not for that foolish club."

Wonwoo winces when he sees his mum at the dining table, sipping on something from a cup. His day would have been bearable had he not looked at her right now. Talking to Mingyu simply exhausts him, and now he has to deal with his mum.

Wonwoo knows well enough what his mum points at. No matter how hard he tries, his grades eventually stooped the slightest bit -- all because of Kim fucking Mingyu -- and news had already reached Jeon Hyeri. How the fuck it happened, Wonwoo doesn't have a single clue. All he knows is that he's about to sit through yet another session of being taunted, mocked and reprimanded by his mum. Worst case scenario, his dad would come back home just then, and Wonwoo might even get a serious beating.

It's not the first time this is happening, clearly, and it's not the last either.

"I'm sorry mum, I'm trying."

"It sure doesn't seem like it. Don't follow your sister's footsteps. You can do way better."

Wonwoo turns red in fury, quite literally, as his mum jabbed at Somi. His ears and neck burn, and it takes everything in him to bravely lift his head in front of his mum and look her dead in the eye. "Don't fucking bring her in this. You don't even know half the truth." He snarls.

Shit. The way his mum's eyebrows quirk up immediately, Wonwoo knows he's fucked. Forget his dad, he might not be able to lift his arm tomorrow if his mum sprang into action. 

"What did you just say, hm?" Hyeri stands from the chair, walking agonisingly slowly towards Wonwoo. His head drops instantly and his fists clench behind his back, involuntarily. His head gets pulled upwards quite roughly by the hair, as he's forced to make eye contact with his mum - who has a wild look in her eyes.

Wonwoo's head helplessly flops to the side, and his cheek burns. "Watch. Your. Language." Says Hyeri, a threatening hardness to her voice, which still makes Wonwoo tremble in spite of how many times he's had to hear it.

"And what do I care about the truth? She's dead you moron, learn to move on and stop moping like a helpless stray animal." She lands another resonating slap to the same cheek, her wedding ring scraping painfully against the battered skin. His mum harshly loosens her grip on his hair, and goes back to her cup on the dining table like nothing happened.

"Don't be so fucking sensitive, leave. And try to work harder, I didn't raise a slacker."

"Bold of you to assume you ever raised me. Somi did." Wonwoo mutters, padding away to the stairway as fast as he could.

Wonwoo cries into his pillow when he reaches his room, after bolting the door and throwing his bag away somewhere in the room. He doesn't bother changing out of his uniform, he's too busy powerlessly shedding tears.

At times Wonwoo feels it would be nice to have somebody who can relate to him, and someone with whom he could talk to. Sure, to the outside world, Wonwoo's the life-of-the-party type of person, who's everywhere and with everyone. It may seem he's got a bit too many friends, but Wonwoo knows they're not even close to the definition of a friend. They're just people who come and go on their own whim, but they're incredibly good at pretending to be Wonwoo's doormats. 

Wonwoo would just like to have someone who listens, without judging, without providing solutions he didn't ask for. Just somebody who would readily listen. He scoffs, chiding himself, for he even managed to imagine what having someone like that would be. It's a sick joke his brain played on him; giving him hope. 

Wonwoo hates hope. He often wonders why and how people could rely on something as absolutely ridiculous as hope. Hope did nothing, except leave him disappointed and even more sullen than he would have been, had he not hoped for something to happen.

It only convinces him further that there's no other way to survive in this world, other than fending for yourself, and all expectations and wishes should be forgotten. They sound horrible even in dreams, as they make waking up a painful task.

It angers Wonwoo to no extent when he sees people living their life to the fullest, and when they don't even feel the need to hope for something. Their lives are so fucking golden, they don't need anything else. They just leave Wonwoo feeling more miserable than ever, while he desperately tries not to think about them too much.

But he can't help it; looking at everyone but him, having perfect lives, makes him greedy. The more people he sees with such lives, he again falls into the vicious cycle of hoping, and then regretting for ever doing so. Even if he got moments of silence in the house, Wonwoo would consider himself god's favourite.

That's all Wonwoo wants, but unfortunately, he doesn't see himself ever getting that luxury.

∿

Pledis is just as terrible as any other day, but Wonwoo tries to ignore it, focusing on the class he sits in at the moment, trying hard like he told his mum last evening. He tries to not let his hand travel inside the depths of his backpack to pull out his diary and scribble away in it.

He doesn't really need to pay attention in this class, Wonwoo decides. He's naturally good at it. Plus Mingyu's not in it, Wonwoo doesn't have worries about the class.

He finally ends up grabbing his diary, and begins writing to Somi, like most times. The only occasions he doesn't address his entries to her, are when things at home are unbearably gruesome. Wonwoo lets Somi have her peace, even if she's not here. He writes about his encounter with his mum yesterday, skimping on the details about the conversation. And then he proceeds to narrate the amount of university work he did; Wonwoo's quite proud of it. He usually is, until either of his parents have to point it out.

Class gets dismissed, and Wonwoo stuffs the diary back in his backpack, waiting for everyone to leave before him.

The sight of nearly everyone in the hallways grinning, or engaged in conversation with their friends, is so repulsive to Wonwoo, he decides to spend lunch alone again, but on deck this time.

---

A day late, but THE NEW TEASER OH MY GODS !!

IT'S A BLESSING TO GET WONWOO MAIN CHARACTER ERA BACK AGAIN !!