Of Parchment and Saltwater

Chapter 18

     I breathed hard through gritted teeth, gripping the quilt silently in attempt to not awaken Benjamin. I'd been having about one contraction a day for a little less than a week, but this was the second one in almost an hour.
It felt as though my abdomen was twisting itself inside out, and my lower back seemed to seize up every time another contraction came on. When I tried to fight against the excruciating pain, it only got worse.
Benjamin shifted in his sleep and I bit my lip, hoping to let him rest for as long as possible. As the contraction subsided, I took a shaking breath and tried to go back to sleep again, although it was practically impossible to find a comfortable position.

I awoke again, moaning in excruciating pain. Benjamin sat upright in bed and looked at me with terror in his eyes, visible even in the dim candlelight.
"Is it happening?" he asked, putting a hand on my stomach.
I shook my head. "No, Ben. Go back to sleep, I'm fine. I'll wake you when-"
"Louisa," he interrupted anxiously, "perhaps I should get the midwife. You're going to have the baby right now!"
He jumped out of bed and I grabbed his hand, laughing a little. "I promise you, love, they're still an hour apart. I'll let you know when there's five minutes between contractions, alright? Go to sleep."
After much convincing, he reluctantly laid back down and I fell back into a restless sleep within a few minutes.

     "Louisa!" I felt Benjamin gently shake me and I squeezed my eyes shut as pain raced through my body, "You were having another contraction in your sleep. It's been ten minutes since the last one...I counted."
     I rolled over and looked at him with squinted eyes. "Ten?" I breathed. He nodded and stammered, "I think I should fetch the midwife now. But I can't leave you alone here, Louise, I just can't do that."
     I gripped his hand and looked up at the ceiling as my pelvis felt as though it was going to break apart. "I'll be fine for a little while; send William over to wait with me if you'd like."
     Benjamin put on a shirt and his cloak hurriedly and kissed me urgently. "Please don't have this child before I come back," he begged with a small smile, "I love you, darling."
     As I laid in bed alone, all I could do was focus on breathing. I was no longer afraid of dying or losing the child; the agonizing pain was all I could think about.
     The door opened a few minutes later and I heard William run up the steps, rushing to kneel beside the bed with a lantern in his hand.
     "Louisa," he whispered, "Major Tallmadge said you're going to have the baby soon. Are you...alright?"
     I nodded and panted with a wry smile, "I should move to the other bedroom, Will. I don't want to mess up this bed."
     He furrowed his eyebrows as I sat up laboriously. "Are you sure you can-"
     "Yes, love, but you must help me." I leaned heavily on him and laid down on the bed that used to belong to Mary and James across the hall. I was too stressed to think about the terrible memories.
     "You know," I breathed between contractions as he held my hand, "your mother said that this midwife helped deliver you, William. And practically every other person in this town. Do you know the family?"
He shook his head, looking anxiously between my eyes and my stomach. "I've only seen her in the market, and her husband rarely visits the newspaper press. How many children have you delivered for other women in the camp, Louisa?"
"Mmm...seven, if I'm not mistaken," I inhaled sharply as another wave of pain came, "and I'm glad I've had those experiences. To keep me calm here, you know?"
William kissed my hand and laughed a little as I dealt with the pain silently. "You're doing an excellent job. I suppose my mother is looking for me by now; once you have the baby I'll run home and tell her where I've been, then I can come back and help."
     I raised my eyebrows weakly, "Benjamin didn't tell your mother?"
     "He was so distraught that he ran right into my bedroom and told me to come here, and that he was fetching the birth attendant and midwife. I was too tired and confused to argue and he was on his horse and down the road by the time I had my shoes on! Major Tallmadge loves you, Louisa...more than you could ever imagine."
I smiled at the thought of how terrified Ben was of the whole thing; it was as though he'd never seen me in pain before and that was certainly not the case.
Just then, the most terrible twisting feeling gripped me and I cried out, William looking at me with terror in his eyes. Thundering footsteps echoed towards the room and Benjamin raced in, panting hard. The midwife followed and William stood up, unsure what to do with himself.
     "Will," I breathed, "if you would like, you could put away the horses and do whatever you'd like downstairs. That is, assuming you don't feel comfortable up here."
     He nodded and took my hand comfortingly. "I'll wait downstairs and make some tea for you all. God be with you, dear Louisa, I know you can do it."
     When he was gone, the midwife began to start a fire in the fireplace and Benjamin knelt beside me, to her dismay. "Sir, you know it's improper for you to be in here...we'll call you in when the baby is born."
She began to pull him towards the door but I reached for him desperately. "Please, Miss Wilson, I beg you to let him stay! I need him."
"I'm not-"
"Please!" I squeezed Ben's hand as another contraction seized me and I could feel him trembling. He was more terrified than I was.
"Alright," she relented, "just don't get in my way...and if you pass out, I'm not moving you."
I tried to thank her but it quickly turned into a scream as more pain raced through my abdomen.
"This may go more quickly than I first imagined," she said as Ben rubbed my back, obviously wishing there was more he could do to help, "it should be only a few minutes now. The child is coming."
I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to remember to breathe. The agony reminded me of being treated for my infected gunshot wound in Major André's tent. But this was much more worth it.
Within the final push, I grabbed Benjamin's shoulder and pulled him to me, drenched in sweat and barely able to move for fear of more suffering to follow. He looked like the same terrified Calvary lad I'd first met in that tavern to deliver intelligence.
"I'm so proud of you, darling," he whispered, his long hair falling into my face.
A baby's cry.
A boy.
The child was quickly swaddled in linens and I pulled him to my chest, tears of joy and relief streaming down my face. I'd never fallen in love with anyone so quickly.
"Oh, Ben!" I cried, "He's beautiful, isn't he? Your son!"
     I could feel Benjamin's overwhelmed sobs as he embraced me, sliding into the bed next to me. "My son," he whispered, running a gentle finger across the baby's cheek.
     The midwife smiled and I took a shaking breath. His eyes were big and blue like Benjamin's, and light brown tufts of hair were stuck up on his head. He cried loudly, but it was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard.
"Samuel?" I said softly, putting my head against Benjamin's chest, "For both of our dear brothers?"
     He smiled and put his finger into his little son's hand. "Samuel Tallmadge," he whispered, "I cannot wait to watch you grow up. We've been praying for you, you know? Your mother is the most wonderful woman in all the world and I know you'll love her almost as much as I do. She's good at dealing with boys like you and me."
     We laid there like a family, a real family. I had never been so happy.

Hey guys SOO SSSOOOORRRRYYYYYY ITS A SHORT CHAPTER THAT TOOOK SOOOO LOONNGGGG PLEASE FORGIVE ME my school's musical (peter pan yee) was this week so I was at school from 7 am to 10:30 pm every day this week but ONLY TWO MORE PERFORMANCE DAYS LEFT SO  I PROMISE IT WILL GET BACK TO NORMAL SOON SORRY LOVE YOU ALL😘