To Be A Runner

Chapter 16: Irritation and Frustration

My hands furiously sign in hopes to get Sarah to talk to me about Project Greenshoot, but she ignores me and continues running, talking to Sam when he tunes in. I grit my teeth in frustration as I try not to strangle the older runner then and there.

You can't just say stuff like that and expect me to keep going like this is a casual thing! That's not how this stuff works!

Oh, how I wish I could growl in frustration right now.

"How're you doing, Five?" Sam questions. "You've been awfully quiet."

'I'm always quiet, Sam,' I reply, my fingers tapping harshly on the mic.

"Well, uh-uh yeah but usually you say something, you know," He stumbles. "A lot of the times it's really, really bad sarcasm and I'm not making this any better for myself, am I?"

"Don't mind her, Sam. Five's just feeling a bit down since she had to take out her chopper pilot," Sarah cuts in. "She'd just turned when we got there."

"You mean she was alive this whole time?" He asks in disbelief. "But how-"

'Emergency food and really good hiding skills,' I answer quickly. 'If we would've come earlier she... would still be alive.'

"Don't feel bad, Five," Sam reassures calmly. "You didn't know."

I don't answer. I can't not feel bad about this. In the moment, I felt barely anything. I was too worried about saving my own skin to feel guilty, but now... now I feel terrible.

I reach down and pick a wooden pencil. It's small, but useful, plus keeping the eye out for random items helps distract me... just a little.

"So you found everything you needed to?"

"Oh, I think so," Sarah chirps. "Although Five here is still as nameless as ever, unless you want to call her 5572148."

"What?"

I scrunch up my face in a grimace. I was never called that at Mullins, but still that's who I was-who I am. My old name died when I left the AMTB. This 'name' I have... it's what Mullins paid to have me.

"That's what it says on her name."

'Since my name was not important enough to be put on my card it's not important enough to be talked about.' I keep my lips pursed as Sarah sends me an odd look, but I pay her no mind as we get closer to Abel.

"Oh, y-yeah. I guess so but... yeah." There's an awkward pause. "Raise the gates!"

I ignore the blare of the gates and run inside the town, opening my pack and dumping out the contents to be inspected. Following the doctor to the small tent, I stay silent and do what she says to make this as quickly as possible. As soon as I'm finished, Sarah comes in.

I click off my headset, walking through the Township in frustration. Why won't she tell me about Project Greenshoot now? Why wait?

This isn't some weird story where I have to be 'ready' or be told when 'the time is right'. This is what I was sent here for-to do this mission then... then go back home... or stay or whatever it is Project Greenshoot calls for.

"Runner Five," Willis calls, rushing towards me with Milo and Penelope on his heels. "Runner Five, did you find anything cool on your run?"

'Sure, if you think a pencil's cool,' I answer, although my face shows no indication of joking.

"Oh, that's actually not cool since we need those for school." Milo spits out the last word like it's poison, but his face immediately brightens. "But it means I can draw more. Look at this stretch I made last night."