Arctic Heart [#Wattys2018 Winner]

Chapter 29

Chapter 29
Dream

I wasn't able to think properly while I was driving on my way home. Image of Jace while drawing on his table kept on replaying inside my mind. I can't accept that my passionate Jace was giving up his passion for me. I didn't want him giving up his dream just to make my dream easier for me to achieve.

I should be happy right now because we didn't have any problem with my mom anymore. He was completely accepted by my mother because he was going to inherit his family's outstanding company. I wanted him to be accepted by my mother, but not in that way. He didn't have to give up anything for me. That's not what I wanted.

Siguro'y iisipin ng iba na napaka-swerte ko dahil mahal ako ng isang katulad ni Jace na handang magsakripisyo para sa akin, pero bilang maging dahilan ng pagsasakripisyo na 'yon ay parang kay bigat. Para bang pasan mo ang lahat ng paghihirap niya.

I don't think I can live and be happy with the person who makes me complete if I'm the reason why he's incomplete.

"Zarina, you're home already!" Mom happily exclaimed when she saw me entered our house.

Nilingon ko naman sila ni daddy na magkasamang nakaupo sa aming sofa. She was exceptionally in a good mood because she already got what she wanted to happen.

I just can't stand how selfish she was. I can't believe that someone like her is my mother.

Instead of feeling guilty because someone sacrificed something for her to feel the satisfaction she wanted to feel, she even had the audacity to be enthusiastic.

"Have you eaten dinner already?" she asked me in a very motherly tone. "Nakakain na kami ng daddy mo. I can heat the leftover food for you―"

"Kumain na po ako sa labas," pagputol ko sa kanya.

"Oh..." She smiled. "Kasama mo ba si Jace magdinner?"

I almost laughed with no humor, but I stopped myself through gritting my teeth. Naiinis na ako kapag binabanggit niya ang pangalan ni Jace.

"Hindi po si Jace ang kasama ko," sabi ko.

Nawala naman ang kanyang ngiti. "Akala ko siya ang kasama mo..." sabi niya. "You should invite him again to eat dinner in our house. O kaya ay ako na mismo ang mag-iimbita sa kanya. I'll cook. Can you tell me his favorite dishes?"

"I'm tired, 'mmy..." sabi ko na lang dahil ayoko nang sagutin pa ang kanyang tanong.

I was trying my best to still respect her because she's my mother. I was already in my best behavior. Kapag nagtagal pa akong kausap siya ay baka mapigtas pa ang pasensyang pinapahaba ko.

"Aakyat na po ako sa kwarto ko. Good night po," pamamaalam ko sa kanilang dalawa ni daddy.

Wala na akong inaksayang panahon at dire-diretso ang pag-akyat sa aking kwarto upang mapag-isa.

Sa tingin ko'y mahihirapan akong patawarin si mommy dahil sa ginawa niya sa aming dalawa ni Jace. Nagtagumpay na siya sa kanyang gustong mangyari at nanalo, ngunit kapalit nito ay baka kami naman ang matalo.

"Zarina..."

I heard my dad's voice outside my room along with soft knocks on the door.

"Please open the door..." pakiusap ni daddy. "Gusto kitang makausap."

Kinagat ko ang aking ibabang labi bago huminga ng malalim at tinungo ang pintuan para mapagbuksan si daddy ng pintuan. His face immediately greeted me with a concerned expression.

"Can I come in, darling?" he sweetly asked me.

Tipid naman akong ngumiti bago bumalik sa aking kama. Tuluyan namang pumasok si daddy sa loob ng kwarto at sinarado ang pintuan bago luampit sa akin.