guilt

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liked by samaracavelli, shawnmendes, jeff and 2,154,733 others

daviddobrik   Samara anytime I put a camera on her. She got me good in today's vlog. Go check it out.

jeff   so happy for you bro

arianagrande   I can't breathe I'm so excited

jasonnash   I can't believe you did this to me

jasonnash  just kidding I'm excited for you

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Shawn left back to Toronto that night. We promised to each other that we would make this co parenting thing work. I told him to move on and get over me because he deserved to find someone new. I did. 

David came up with what he called a brilliant idea and wanted the entire vlog squad to come over for a video so we could prank him. I thought it was a great idea, then I came up with my own idea. I'd prank him, while we pranked everyone else.

David had been wanting to do this prank for a while, and I thought it'd be funny, but I knew mine would be even more funny than his so called brilliant idea. 

He had left for his campus visit and I stayed home to spend time with parents and catch them up on everything Shawn related that happened in the past 24 hours. 

Ariana went ahead and came over and we chatted and I caught her up as well on what had happened. 

"Can you honestly say though that you don't love him anymore? He was a big part of your life, the father of your kid, the feelings don't go away easily." She said. She was laying with her head in my lap as we attempted to watch whatever was playing on the TV.

"I'll always love him, but not in that way, I suppose. I love David with my whole heart. It feels different with him." I continued playing with her hair as I spoke. "There's no ups or downs, you know. It's just... steady. Perfect."

"I'm happy that you're happy. Do you see this as a forever thing?" She asked.

"Yeah, we talked about it. I actually see myself marrying him. It's crazy. Kora having little siblings." I smiled a little, pictures showing up in my mind. 

She sat up quickly, getting close to my face as she whispered, "Is the sex good?" 

"It's amazing." I laughed, feeling my cheeks get hot as I blushed.

"Better than Shawn?" 

"Ugh, I've had this conversation with myself. I can't tell." 

"What do you mean you can't tell?" She laughed. "No, you know who's better. Tell me." 

"I can't tell." 

"Shawn?" She asked. Upon my silence, she gasped and squealed loudly, covering her mouth, "David?! Really?"

I just began laughing at her reaction. 

"I wouldn't doubt David has better dick game after that Shawn and Camila video." She pretended to gag and I rolled my eyes. "Are you sure you're not just telling yourself that you're out of love with Shawn?"

"I'll be honest, I keep asking myself that. I think I am. I want to be, because I love David so much. Just that, so much went on with Shawn and I."

"Whatever makes you happy is what I want you to do."

"I'm happy with David."

"But are you only happy with David because of how pissed off Shawn made you."

dave: on the way with the vlog squad. be prepared for the prank love u

"He's on his way." I told Ariana. 

We went downstairs and Ariana went and sat in the office with my mom until it was our turn, while I sat on the couch, pretending I had nothing going on.

Once everyone got there and I said hello to everyone, we mingled for a bit, and once we got everyone around the countertop and I stood in the middle of everyone, David stood on the chair and began filming. 

"So, obviously we're here to celebrate something. Does anyone have any guess of what it is?"

"Samara's going on a world tour and we're all invited?" Scotty said, when no one replied, "And I'm opening?" his voice got quieter, disappointment in his voice.

"That was really sad," David said and everyone started laughing. "No, I accidentally got Samara pregnant." 

I put my hands over my mouth after everyone gasped and turned to look at me. 

"Wait, is this a prank? I don't believe you." Carly interrupted, looking back at David. 

"How do you accidentally get someone pregnant?" Jeff was laughing so hard, he could barely breathe.

I was being bombarded with a million questions when David finally calmed everyone down and said, "It's a girl and we're naming her 'It's a Prank'." 

Everyone groaned and more chattered continued. I peaked at Ariana, who had my camera in her hand, running around the corner with pink balloons, "Except it's not a prank!" 

"Wait, what the fuck?" David nearly fell off the chair, causing me to reach out for him, but I could barely focus from how hard I was laughing. "Oh my god, is this real?"

"Is what real?" I was having a hard time as I made my way to stand next to David. He reached for my hand, putting his camera down on the counter. 

"I literally cannot focus, Ariana Grande- what? Are you actually pregnant?" I didn't say anything and he brushed my hair from my face. "Oh my god, wait. Are you actually?"

I felt bad seeing his reaction, and my eyes got watery. 

"Got ya!" Ariana yelled and everyone started laughing again. 

David started laughing too, but I knew David. He was upset.

I stood up and whispered in his ear, covering my mouth so no one could see, "No, but we could fix that."

He looked down at me and smiled, kissing me gently. 

Everyone collectively said an overdramatic 'awww' and it was back to normal. Normal conversations, my mother and father cooked a gigantic Italian dinner for everyone and Ariana got to know everyone. 

It was crazy like my two worlds colliding. 

Everyone ended up going back to their hotels, Ariana went home and David and I went to have a movie night in the guest house. 

It felt so weird that one of the few memories I have of this guest house was Shawn and I hooking up while a label party was going on in the main house. 

I did miss Shawn. As much as I hated how things ended and why they ended, I couldn't help but miss him. Despite the bad, there was so much more good in our relationship. 

I felt guilty for missing Shawn. 

Don't get me wrong, I loved David a lot. 

I just couldn't help but wonder if Shawn and I had worked it out, how would things be now?



oop

I know yall are getting sick of davmara but its almost over

but also thanks to @shawnmendesthealbum , a David book is in the works and will be posted after the next few chapters

comment and vote

all the love 


due date // s.mWhere stories live. Discover now