All Four Of Me

Chapter 6

KENZIE

"Kenzie sweetheart, dinner is ready." Will announces, poking his head into the room.

Like the last few nights when one of the guys came up to announce dinner, I simply acknowledge him with a nod and make my way to the dining room where William, Chris and Nathan are already seated at the table. The moment I sit down James places a bowl of steaming hot soup in front of me which I quickly thank him for.

"This is Mitchell's famous cauliflower curry soup." Chris says excitedly, as if the delectable smell wafting through the room is making him as hungry as it is me.

"It smells wonderful." I confess, leaning forward so that I can easily inhale the warming scent.

"Thanks Mack, I hope you like it." Mitchell responds with a proud smile while placing a giant bowl of papadums at the centre of the table for everyone to share.

"Lets eat!" Nathan prompts, his spoon clutched readily between his fingers as he looks yearningly towards his own bowl of soup.

For the first time this week there is relative silence as we all eat. Not even Nathan tries to spark up a conversation and the only noises that can be heard are the clanging of spoons against porcelain as well as the occasional crunch of a papadum in between. Admittedly, the soup tastes ten times better than it smells and despite being bland in colour the vibrant mix of spices together with the underlying kick of chilli make it impossible not to enjoy.

"This reminds me of Mishka and Sadhil." I muse out loud, placing my spoon in the empty bowl and pushing it slightly towards the middle of the table to indicate that I am finished.

The random clinking of spoons stops abruptly as the men in the room register my words. Surprise is the first emotion evident on their faces, but I watch in slight amusement as their shock morphs into happiness.

I had successfully been able to avoid almost all interaction with the other men living in the house for the past few days, with dinner time being the only exception. They like to try and include me in their conversations by asking me questions and telling me stories, but I usually remain quiet, only answering in small sentences when silence is not an option.

At times can tell that my lack of participation frustrates them sometimes, especially when it comes to "family" activities like watching movies or playing board games, but they never push me too far on the subject. There are some moments where I find myself longing to join in on their conversations or laugh at their jokes, anything to feel like I am a part of their family, but then I remember all the other times I had grown too attached to some of my other foster families only for them to abandon me at a later time.

But tonight, I feel brave enough to share this one thing with them. Maybe it was the comforting taste of the curry, or the relaxed atmosphere in the room, but the bittersweet memories of my former foster family seem like a harmless tidbit of information to divulge in this moment.

"They were the Indian couple you were placed with, right?" Nathan asks pensively. I have no doubt that he has read my file in its entirety and is well aware of all my previous placements, including my stay with the Singh family.

"Yes, I think it was about five years ago, but I could be wrong." I have been in so many different foster homes that at some point I had lost track of who I had lived with at what point of time. I am convinced that there are also some placements that I can't even remember at all.

"The Singh's were the nicest people I have ever lived with."

Sadhil had been the closest thing to a father figure that I had experienced up until that point of my life. He was kind, patient and always took the time to teach me everything he knew about the world and in particular his Indian heritage and cuisine. We had spent countless hours together in the kitchen, Sadhil teaching me how to prepare almost every kind of Indian delicacy he knew and his wife, Mishka playfully chastising him whenever he would do something the wrong way.