To heal is to feel

The magic juice

I sit in silence with my arms crossed over my chest, the groups laughs and conversation is the only thing going on.

I try and shake off the memory of mom, the bad one. A chill rolls through my skin, making me shiver a couple of times before rubbing my arms with my hands to try and create some warmth.

I feel Carl accidentally hit the arm the doctor put the shot on, i flinch back and wipe my head to Carl who didn't seem to notice and continued eating his food with a smile on his lips.

I roll my eyes and look back at the food in front of me, my stomach was growling for something, anything, but I was too mad at daryl and that doctor to eat anything.

"Fine."

I look up to see a chuckling Dale give a glass of some dark purple liquid to Lori

"You know, in Italy , children have a little bit of wine with dinner." Dale says to lie has she accepts the glass of, wine. It looked just like the magic juice mom Hague me when I had trouble sleeping. I fel asleep instantly after a few sips of the 'magic juice'

The taste though... I had to get used to if I wanted to fall asleep.

"Well, when Carl is in Italy or France, he can have some." Lori replies with, taking a so of the wine , Carl looks up at his dad that was sitting besides me with a hopeful glint in his eyes

"What's it going to hurt, come on." Rick gives into carls silent plead and persuades Lori, the group cheer in happiness and look at Carl attentively

I look down at my lap before looking up at Carl as Dale porous his glass with the wine.

Carl takes a sip before immediately sitting the glass back down with a sour face, I'm guessing he didn't like it.

"Eww." He yelled, the group laugh at his reaction while I can't help but smile up at Carl while handing him my napkin. I guess wine isn't for everyone.

"That's my boy. That's my boy." Lori praises Carl , and then fills her glass with carls wine.

"Well, just stick to soda pop there, bud." Shane says , before his eyes shift to me and he gives me a quick wink. I smile up at him and try to wink back he chuckles at my action and looks down at his food with a soft smile.

I hear Dale clear his throat and I look up at him to see he's already looking at me with raised eyebrows. I raise my own in confusion.

"What about you young lady, want to try some." He asked, I shrug my shoulders in response. Scared that I'll not like it like Carl did.

I see Rick grab my cup from the corner of my eye, and holding it up to Dale. He pours the wine till it's half full, Rick sets it in front of me and I look up at him for an answer.

"Come on, Carl already tried it. Come on." He whispered to me, his breath smelling for grapes and something else. He wiggles his eyebrows at me in a joking manner.

I take the cup out of his hand with both of my hands and look around the group to see that they are looking at me with the same tension as they did with Carl.

Okay.

I bring the liquid to my nose and sniff it softly, it smells just like the magic juice , except for the scent of grape in it. The magic juice smelled more of rose.

I bring the cup down to my mouth and take a small sip of it, closing my eyes and expecting for a sour expression to take over my face. But, it wasn't to bad... I opened my eyes slowly, my shoulders slumping as I sip the rest down with small gulps.

When I'm done I set the cup down and wipe my lips with my shirt. I hear the group erupt in a louder chaos of laughs and chokes of wine.

What happened?

"I wasn't- wow." I hear Carl say as he looks down at me with that beaming smile of his as his eyes shine with surprise, i furrow My brows and shrug my shoulders at Carl.

"Can I have more-" I start to say as I bring the cup up to a frozen Dale who looks as stuns as the rest, I see Rick move for the first time since I drank the wine

"That's enough for today, damn Lana." Rick says as he takes a napkin and cleans my cup before pouring me some water and holding it up to my lips.

"Not you, Glenn." Daryl says, looking at Glenn from across the room, I look down the table to see Glenn smiling like a idiot with glazed eyes. Yeah, he's feeling the wine.

"What?" He asked, stupidly.

"Keep drinking little man. I want to see how red your face can get." Daryl says in a joke manner, pouring some white looking wine into his glass again. I think it was his sixth glass.

I feel the glass being pressed against my lips again, I shift my eyes to a concerning looking rick that's too body sways a bit.

I roll my eyes at him and take the cup from his hands, " I'm not six." I drink all the water with a thirsty mouth. I breath out a relieved breath, I froze when I felt Ricks fingers run comfortingly through my nested hair.

I forgot about the situation where he kept my knife from me and moved closer to his side. Finding his warmth comfortingly warm in this cold room.

The group continues to let out laughs and jokes till they couldn't breath and I look on with a beaming smile and a warm chested feeling.

It feels good, and I don't want it to end.

Rick grabs a fork and taps a empty glass before standing up, gently moving me to the side as he gets up.

I look up at him with a confused look as the whole group settles down at looks to rick.

"It seems to me we have t thanked our host properly." He says as he holds up his glass and turns to our host, the doctor.

"He is more than just our host." T dog says with a slight slur to his voice, rick nods in agreement. The group starts to thank Jenner.

"Booyah!" Daryl suddenly exclaims and people cheer louder

"So when are you gonna tell us what the hell happened here , doc? All the- the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened." Shane says, breaking the happiness in the room with a knife.

"We're celebrating Shane. Don't need to do this now." Rick sits back down as he says the words

"Whoa, wait a second. This is why we're here, right? This was your move- - to get some answers— instead we- we found him. Found one man. Why?" Shane questions, I look at him then to Jenner as I slowly relax my back to the chair, eating a toasted bread.

"Well, when things got bad, a lot of people just left,went off to be with their families. And when things got worse, when the military Carlson got overrun, the rest bolted." Jenner states, I finish my toast and wipe my hand on my lap.

"Every last one." Shane questions further

"No, many couldn't face walking out the door. They ... opted out." Jenner says in a careful tone which seems to make some of the group fidget, but why? What does that mean? " there was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time." Jenner says, looking down at his glass with , what I could make out, a head full of thoughts.

Opted out... suicides? Why would some one give up with out trying at first?

"You didn't leave...why?" Andreas the one to question Jenner , now breaking the mad tension

"I just kept working, hoping to do some good." Jenner say, and in this moment, as I look up at the strange guy, the strange doctor... I see how tired he is.

"Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man." Glenn says to a regrettable Shane.

My eyes start to feel heavy and dry at the same time, a yawn coming up my throat, so I close my eyes and yawn down at my lap.

I haven't felt this tired since the day before the world went to shit, the magic juice must be working its magic.