Divorce

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I was on top of the world. We won gold, made new friends and got to visit sunny LA in the process. Everything was perfect... But the instant I got home, it all started to crumble beyond recognition. Things weren't exactly great between my parents before I left - but now it's like a full blown war zone. It feels as if I was always just a pawn - part of the stay together for the kids mentality. I stepped out and it all went to shit. This is on me.

Needing to escape the rotting four walls I call home, I climb out of my bedroom window and down the fire exit during another one of my parents' screaming matches. Lost in my own brain, I walk aimlessly - eyes glued to the floor - until I reach my best friend's house. Being so physically, mentally and emotionally drained that I lack the ability to raise a hand to knock on the door, I bang my head on it a couple times to get his attention.

"Hey! That's so crazy, I was just about to call you." Charlie rambles as he opens the door. "You wanna- hey, you okay?" He asks as he notices me standing in front of him almost lifeless.

"No." Escapes my mouth barely above a whisper without moving my lips.

"I bet I can guess why." He rolls his eyes with a hint of anger in his voice. "Come in."

"Thanks." He gives me a look of sympathy as I walk past and crash on the couch.

"You know, I've seen it all from you. Happy, screaming, crying - all that. But brick wall is a new one." Charlie comments as he walks through to the kitchen, catching a glimpse of my emotionless face as I stare into space. "My mom finishes work in like an hour, so I'm gonna start on dinner soon. I'm making burgers, you wanna stay? I have enough to factor you in. I could also do spaghetti if you-" I cut off his rambling.

"They're getting divorced."

"What?" His face and heart drop.

"It's over, Charlie."

"Y/N, I'm so sorry." He stops pouring our drinks and looks over with a saddened demeanor.

"It's my fault."

"What? No, no, no, why would you say that?" He rushes over with a sense of urgency and sits beside me, giving me his full attention.

"Because it's true." I finally speak up and put some motion into my body.

"Yeah... I'm not following this at all." He just stares at me confused.

"Think about it, Charlie. Things weren't so bad when we left. I make sure that they don't clash as much and find ways to keep them apart. I do so much around the house to kill conflict before it happens. It's like I was the glue that kept everything together from the brink of collapse. I shouldn't have gone to LA, I should never have joined team USA. I stepped out and let it burn to the ground. I let them down."

"Now this is where I have a problem. You didn't let them down, Y/N, they let you down."

"But, Charlie-" He quickly cuts me off.

"No buts. Just.. Just listen." He forces eye contact, staring into my soul to get his point across. "This isn't your fault. Nothing is your fault, okay? I need you to know that. Divorce sucks, it really does. And the effect it has on the kids often gets overlooked. You spend years of your life questioning why it didn't work and what you did wrong and why they don't love you anymore." He speaks from experience.

"You were young enough to not have a single memory of the guy, Charlie. Our situations aren't exactly the same."

"Exactly! Y/N, your parents use you to stop the apocalypse. They'd throw you to the wolves if they thought it'd do something. You were forced to grow up way too fast. I've known you my whole life and I don't remember a time when things were any different. You're a kid, it's not your job to keep your parents' marriage alive." A few stray tears slip down my cheeks as I listen.

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