xxxi. nightime routine

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As the night dwells in
and my mask slowly falls
a rainfall of what I'd hidden
the tears I hid from all

refuse to hold back
as each drop rolls down my cheeks
in the dead of the night pitch black
with no comfort I can seek

my heart thums rapidly, as it clenches and unclenches
as my mind plays tapes of loving words and faded promises

I stopped trying to hold it down
I know the fan will cover my agony
can't afford the slip of a frown
cuz some people only misunderstand me

1:18 AM but an hour of misery
the stories of a broken heart and permanently etched memories
each teardrop coming with intolerable pain
promises breaking, memories hurting, people leaving over and over again

it all comes to an end
as sleep now takes me in
but sadness is my friend
it'll come back again tomorrow and win

....

Context: 🌛⭐

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