Heartbreak Hotline

01 || ❝please stay on the line...❞

❝Hello?❞

❝Welcome to the Heartbreak Hotline, where we help mend all broken hearts. Please stay on the line for the next available representative.❞

*ring ring*

❝Hi! Thanks for calling Heartbreak Hotline! This is Representative 103. How can I assist you today?❞

❝I'm interested in becoming a client. I really need some help. Like now.❞

❝Umm...okay. Well you sound really desperate.❞

❝Um, well isn't that the point of calling a hotline?❞

❝Yeah, well I just thought I'd remind you of how ridiculous you sound right now hehe. You sound like you're seriously desperate for some help bud. ❞

❝I am! I need like a 3 month subscription.❞

❝Wait, what? Three months? You can't be serious, right?❞

❝Unfortunately, this is no joke. I've run into quite a slump. ❞

❝Wait, wait. So just how long are you planning on using our services, dude? Most people use them for like one to four days max, no offense.❞

❝Well I'm not 'most people' okay? I seriously just need some guidance. And that guidance is very possibly going to be three months long...❞

❝You have got to be kidding me.❞

❝Please? I'm a disaster. I really need help.❞

❝Well let's see if I can help you now. Then maybe you won't need a subscription. What's the problem here?❞

❝Well there's this girl at school and I sort of have a thing for her...❞

❝Okay, so what's the problem with that?❞

❝I am so freaking scared to walk up to her man. It's like I try to, but then I see her long, beautiful red hair and those gorgeous green eyes and oh my-❞

❝You do realize that this hotline is for people who already have heartbreak? Like people who have just gotten broken up with or rejected...?❞

❝Yeah...and?❞

❝And you just made it sound like you're trying to avoid heartbreak instead of dealing with it...❞

❝...❞

❝You still there?❞

❝Yeah.❞

❝Okay, so normally I don't do this but I guess I'll make an exception just because I need the money.❞

❝Wow, I feel so wanted.❞

❝You can take it or leave it, boo. Either way, the offer's on the table.❞

❝I hate feeling like a second choice though.❞

❝We all do, but sometimes we have to learn how to not be so picky and take what we can get.❞

❝That's pretty much the worst advice ever but unfortunately, I guess I have no choice but accept the offer.❞

❝Being honest, now I'm kind of afraid of what's in store for me...But anyway, that'll be thirty dollars.❞

❝Wait, for what? For this conversation?❞

❝No silly, for my services. Because my darling boy, you cannot build confidence overnight. So what's your credit card number?❞

❝Wait, wait, wait, so please clear this up for me. What do I get out of this? What am I getting out of these thirty dollars, huh?❞

❝Well, let's see. You'll get a two week session with me, 103! You can call as many times as you'd like within a two week span and I'll train you on how to get the girl of your dreams. Plus, you also get to listen to my sweet, sultry voice! It really is a win-win for you if I'm being honest.❞

❝Seriously?❞

❝You asked, I answered.❞

❝So I get two weeks for thirty dollars, unlimited calling?❞

❝That is what I just said.❞

❝Is that sass?❞

❝No, just the truth is all.❞

❝I still think it's sass.❞

❝Are you going to pay or nah? Sorry to cut it short boo, but there are other people waiting on the line if you're not interested.❞

❝Okay, okay. Fine.❞

❝So imma need those digits.❞

❝Isn't that a bit too fast? You don't even know my name or-❞

❝Of your credit card, you idiot. Your credit card.❞

❝Oh.❞

© Lightning_Stryker 2020