The Mates Bond

Eleven

-Chapter Eleven-
Confessions

As I sat in Braxton's car on our way back into town, I found myself dazed. Like I was grateful that the heat was over but now new dread filled me.

This whole Luna training thing was a serious blow...somehow I knew this Grandmother (whose apparently prejudice against humans) won't be as understanding or easy going as Priscilla would have been.

Braxton must've sensed my dread as he gently took a hold of my hand. "Don't worry Gorgeous, we'll be home soon and I'm sure the girls are missing you by now."

As much as I love Elise and Mariah, I wasn't exactly thrilled to see them. No doubt Elise knows exactly why I had to go away, and since the summer of California, Mariah and Elise have been super close so I'm sure Elise filled her in...to come back to them still unmarked was kind of embarrassing. I also knew it was my own choices for remaining mark-less.

I offered Braxton a smile but even he could see the uncertainty behind it.

"Everything okay?" He asked.

"Would it be alright if you took me home...to my parents house?" I asked.

I could see my request had hurt his feelings.

"It's just...if we're going to get down to the marking this weekend I really want to get into the right headspace for that."

He nodded silently and drove on, it wasn't long before we entered town and soon I found myself back at my parents place.

__________

With the beginning of a new week seemed to bring new distractions and new worries. I hardly saw Val as she was so busy studying the night before that I had to catch her in between classes on Monday.

"How're things going with Ryder?" I asked.

Ryder was a good guy, and over the year I'd gotten to know him I found out he was also very kind.

"Ryder...oh he's fine."

I smiled.

"Not like that," she said as she rolled her eyes "I told you im putting guys onto the back burner for a while, but Ryder's very serious when it comes to school and I do admire that about him, at times he's a little more talkative...but lately he's been really quiet, distracted even."

"I wonder what's going on?" I asked.

She shrugged, "Beats me but I hope he's okay...he did mention going home to be with his family this weekend, but that was about it."

I was a little taken aback, I don't know why I just assumed that Ryder's family would live here in town. "Well I hope the trip does help him lift his spirits."

"Same, he's kind of broody when his mind is elsewhere...I did sort of overhear a telephone call he was having after one of our study sessions."

"Valerie!" I reprimanded her.

"Sorry it just sort of happened, anyways it was only breif but he noticed me and waved me goodbye so I went on my way." She admitted, "It wasn't anything juicy anyways, just something about everything being shuffled around and that whoever he was talking to had better be ready."

I breathed a little easier knowing she hadn't heard anything pack/Were related, "only time will tell." I offered. "I'm only here for another class and then I'm off for the day, we should try and have dinner together."

"Sounds fun, figured you'd want to hang with the girls since you were away all week?"

I shook my head, "I just want to relax and not to sound mean or anything but lately there has been a lot of drama."

"There is always going to be drama, but if you girls are there for each other then it helps ease what's going on...you'd want them there for you right?"

I knew she was right but how can I tell her that I have my own stuff going on that's practically overflowing, I felt selfish and that familiar pange of guilt hit me 'How am I ever going to be a Luna...I can hardly handle my own life let alone anyone elses.'

I sighed, "you're right, I'll talk to them after class today." I told her bye and continued onto my class. As much I wasn't looking forward to the class it was a welcome distraction, and before I knew it I was turning in my assingment and telling the professor to have a good day.

I walked out onto the Quad and was in search of the girls I wanted to set up a brunch or something for maybe Sunday, by then I would have definitly had my mark and I would feel less embarrassed about the whole heat situation.

But of course when I walked up the two of them were already making plans for the weekend.

"Elise and I were talking about having a night for just us girls" Mariah sounded excitedly. Saturday afternoon we can hit up a spa for a pamper session, then get dressed up and go out for a nice dinner before heading back to Elise's place and just having an old fashioned sleep over."

I know they meant well and on any other weekend  would be super up for the kick back and relaxing weekend...but not this weekend.

Worse, I couldn't tell them why, I'd never hear the end of it if I told them I was planning on losing my virginity... I'd been down that road already with Elise and then a year full of drama had gotten in the way of it.

They've known me for too long to let me just throw out my morals...even if it is something that I want to do.

"I don't know guys, I was kinda looking forward to spending the weekend with Brax."

Mariah began to protest and I offered to even have the sleep over at Braxton's house, but they both began to go on about Choclate Chip pancakes and after I couldn't think of a good enough excuse (and still trying to hold onto my privacy) I finally gave in before Patrick showed up to whisk Mariah away to an appointment.

This left me with Elise, "you know I hate to admit how good those two are together." I sounded with a sigh.

She smiled, "I like them together, they're good for each other."

"She's good for him, that's for sure." I said.

"So back to you, don't think I didn't notice that you called the house Braxton's or the fact that you were hesitant to hang out...I won't press you for info, just remember that Ry and I are your friends so you should feel comfortable enough to open up to us."

I sighed and hugged her, "there is so much crap happening right now I feel like im going to explode..." and before I knew it, I was in her car venting about everything.

"It was Hell, I  felt like my insides were on literal fire, and then of course all I had to do was take Brax's mark and I couldn't even let him do that...Oh and then there's the whole council guys, they want to meet me and I have to start my training but I can't trian with your Aunt, no they want me to train with your grandmother who I know nothing about except for the fact that she is apparently prejudice against non-weres, and Braxton and I were planning on doing the mark this weekend to get that done even though all I really want is for my freaking Luna mark to be a little freaking romantic so I was actually going to..." I caught myself "try and set something up to make it a little more memorable for the both off us."

She offered me a soft smile, "I can't really imagine what you're going through in the Luna department, but as for the Marking...don't stress over it, it's romantic as is and definitly memorable...do you feel a little better?"

I nodded, "I think I had held it in for long not able to talk to Val because she doesn't know about the Weres or Braxton because it's only hurt his feelings or he's feel responsible..." I sighed, "it actually feels like I can breath a little easier."

She nodded, "stop forgetting that Ry and I are here for you too H."

"I know, I just need to get out of my own damn head."

We talked a little more and she ended up giving me a ride home.