Same Mistakes

17. Baby Blues

17. Baby Blues

Harry.

I hummed along to the radio, which was playing She Will Be Loved by Maroon Five. I actually hear this song playing quite often. It'd be cool to see their concert. It's definitely is a beautiful song. I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of the song. "Are you nervous?" I questioned my beautiful wife as we drove to the clinic.

Samantha turned towards me and met my green eyes with her big, nervous brown ones. Sam just nodded, before turning back towards the rolled-down window. "Well, don't be," I said, taking one hand off the steering wheel. I reached over, and took her hand in mine.

"Everything will be okay, Sam. Someday we will be parents. I promise. Nothing can stop us now." I assured her, squeezing her delicate hand. It was silent for the next few moments, before Samantha spoke up. "But what if we never do?" She choked, voice cracking as a single tear rolled down her cheek. It landed on her dress. "Never do what?" I asked quietly, already knowing the answer.

"Never do become parents." Samantha confirmed, another tear dripping down onto her pale pink dress. "Samantha," I whispered, feeling choked up, "I swear to God. We will be parents. If this doesn't work, we will adopt. If you want a baby, we will adopt a baby. If you would like a child, we will adopt a child. Heck, we will adopt a teen if thats what you want. But we will be parents. I promise."

*
Samantha.

"What we're gonna need you to go, is start taking these," Said Kimberly, our specialist. I gulped, looking at the orange bottle of pills. I felt my eyes fill with tears. The specialist looked up at me, and I quickly blinked the tears back. Kim passed the bottle of pills to Harry, and Harry put it in his pocket. I heard the sounds of the little, white, pills in Harry's pocket whenever Harry would turn.

"Okay, so this is how everything is gonna work," Said Kim, sitting down. "Artificial insemination doesn't work for everyone. You must know that, right? Considering the research you've done." She began explaining. "You're going to start taking those pills. Its basically a fertility drug to help simulate your ovaries," Kim explained, tucking her grey hair behind her ear. I blushed, feeling a little uncomfortable.

"After all that, you'll use an ovulation detection kit, or your doctor will perform an ultrasound to figure out when you'll ovulate so she can time the insemination. Sometimes, you will be given medication to induce ovulation. Once you ovulate, your partner will produce a sperm sample, which will then be washed. This is a necessary process that concentrates the hardiest sperm into a small amount of fluid. Using a catheter, I will put the concentrated sperm directly into your uterus through your cervix. You'll be able to take a pregnancy test about two weeks later to see if you're carrying a child. How does that sound?" Asked Kim.

My eyes were wide, and I'm sure my cheeks were bright red. Harry is the person I'm most comfortable with in the entire world. We could literally sit on the sofa naked with ice cream and watch football or knit a scarf. Thats how our relationship is, in case anyone was wondering.

But for some odd reason, this discussion with Kim is making me feel really uncomfortable, vulnerable, and nervous. Especially because Harry is here with me. I'm probably just antsy to be a Mum. I've always wanted to be a Mum. Always wanted children. I'm scared that my stupid ovaries are going to deny Harry a family.

"Is that all?" Asked Harry, putting his hand over mine. I felt my tensed muscles ease at Harry's touch. "I think so. Just remember to take the pills, Samantha." Kim said sternly. I felt my chest constrict when Kim told me to remember to take the pills. "Okay, thank-you." Said Harry, standing up and picking up my purse for me. "Buh-bye now. I'll see you when you're ovulating," Kimberly chuckled.