Sincerity - Criminal Minds || Spencer Reid Fanfiction

4. Changes

"We all practice self-deception to a degree; no man can handle complete honesty without being cut at each turn. There's not enough room in a man's head for sanity alongside each grief, each worry, each terror that he owns. I'm well used to burying such things in a dark cellar and moving on." ― Mark Lawrence,

The Protector

We pulled up outside of the house and went through the motions of getting out of the car, unbuckling Tilly and walking up the path to the house.

Inside, boxes were piled high in the rooms that used to be so filled with life.

"Uncle Spencer?" Henry's voice broke into my conscience and I turned, blinking at the teenager who was a toddler a couple of years ago.

"I'm sorry things have to be this way, Henry." I said, hugging the boy tightly.

"It's okay," He said sadly. "It'll be good to see grandpops more." He shrugged and I turned to see Beth and Aaron saying goodbye to Will.

"Take care of each other." I said, and proceeded to walk back out of the house, the atmosphere unbearable for any longer.

"Spencer?" Will came out behind me and I turned sheepishly with a small smile.

"About what I said at Jen's funeral..."

"Don't worry about it," I said, shaking my head. "What you said was right," I nodded and sighed, shoving my hands deep inside my pockets. "I'm sorry you're leaving." He shrugged and looked out over the front yard, littered will fallen leaves now.

"How has it been two months without them, Spencer?" He said quietly, watching the leaves fall. "I feel like it was only yesterday I last held her in my arms..." His voice broke and I blinked tears out of my eyes.

"It'll be good for us to get away," He said resolutely after a long silence. Whether he was saying it to convince himself, or me, I wasn't sure. "There are too many memories here. We need change."

I nodded my head and sighed.

"Yeah, I know how you feel," I turned to him and extended my hand. "Take care, Will." He smiled and shook my hand.

"For what it's worth," He said emotionally.

"Melanie made you a better man," He nodded to our hands for emphasis and I smiled emotionally. "And she was a wonderful woman."

Flashback 1

We woke up in England, the sun beating through the window and the birds singing in the trees outside of our window.

"Good morning Mrs Reid." I smiled, pushing the hair out of her beautiful face.

"Good morning, husband." She grinned, reaching up to kiss me.

It was such a blissful moment. So calm and peaceful. We were alone together, the first time since having Tilly a full week ago, and it was nice to bask in our space, as a newly married couple.

"How would you feel about Hotchner-Reid?" She asked me over breakfast-in-bed.

"What do you mean how would I feel about it?" I asked curiously, looking at her as we both chewed on bagels filled with cream cheese.

"Well, I'm your wife now," She shrugged. "And that means taking your name."

"Not necessarily," I disagreed. "I could take yours."

"Spencer Hotchner?" She inquired with an entertained smile. "I'm sure my dad would love that."

"Maybe not your dad," I laughed. "But Jack certainly would."