My Darkening Ember

Chapter Eighteen

I was numb. My face was as cold as the ice burying me. My body was completely submerged. I was barely breathing but slowly my mind came back. How long had I been out? A heavy weight was pressing on my chest. I was buried. The tips of my fingers were frozen but in the palm of my hand, I felt the silver. The dagger, his dagger. I needed out.

Get out. You're dying. Dead. A fool. Buried. Alive.

I began gasping desperately. The ice was over me, only the Gods knew how deep I lay. I had the blade, his blade, I needed out.

I started stabbing the hardened snow, having no clue what was up or down. It was dark, and I knew I didn't have long.

Either dig your way out or accept your icy grave.

Keep calm, I tried telling myself but I felt the panic rising. I was freezing, barely able to gasp in a breath to fill my lungs. It felt like a thousand stones crushing me. Alone in the dark, I started to sob, like small desperate wails that only seemed to be heard in my head. I stabbed harder. I wanted to see the sun again, to feel it on my skin. Not this cold unfamiliar touch. I think I felt tears but I couldn't be sure it wasn't the melting ice. I was alone here and maybe I would die here. No one would ever think of me again. The air thinned and I started to struggle against it. My lungs craved more, my mind was a blur. The voices in my head screamed at me. Suddenly they got quiet. Alone.

The surface broke and I punched my hand upward, feeling a breeze. The sky was above me and I blinked away the snow falling on my face before inhaling deeply, struggling upwards and out of my snowy grave. I climbed onto the ice and moaned in tears from the cold numbing pain, that still had hold of most of my hands and face.

I flipped onto my back. Feeling the sun on my face, I gasped in the air as if I had never had any. I was alive as if born anew. My body shook against the ice and I didn't even hate it. I could feel the cold and I was alive.

Clutching the blade I quickly rose, squinting from the newly found light. Everything was covered in ice. The trees from which we escaped had been covered a little but were still standing. The terrain was as if painted over, renewed for new travellers.

I turned to gaze over the surface, squinting to try and find anything familiar. But there was nothing. Gods, it was as bare as the great sea.

But there, not far from me, a hand poked out from the ice.

Don't.

I sprinted toward it. As fast as my numb feet would carry me I ran toward it, falling on my knees and shoving my hands in the snow. I shovelled it away until my hands were utterly frozen and I could pull whoever it was buried beneath, loose.

"Xander," I desperately called, seeing the back of a head. I pulled again before gasping and falling back.

It was a face but not one of Xander or Mayra's. His face was completely frozen, with his eyes and mouth wide open as if he had screamed in fear watching the raging wave of snow, fall toward him. His features were unknown and he was dead.

I covered my mouth as I couldn't help but weep from terror. I could see nothing but ice for miles. Only the gods would know where Xander or Mayra was buried. They could be deep in the snow and I would never find them.

I was alone.

...

It took moments before I could decide to move on. I had hope before but it had gone now. I would never find them. I was starving and freezing. If I stayed I would die soon. I kept my eyes peeled on the snow looking for any sign of their bodies, something to tell me if they were alive or not. But I saw nothing and so I didn't stop moving.