My Darkening Ember

Chapter Forty - One

I woke the next morning still reeling from the night before. Just thinking of him made me fuzzy. I shook it off in annoyance. I was truly pathetic. It was impossible. He could never feel anything. He was a born killer. A trained assassin. A broken horse.

From childhood, they learned to shave their feelings down until there is nothing left but gruesome emotions. That's what I had to keep reminding myself of.

The door burst open and Mayra entered, in all her grace. She had opted for a subtle dress for the first time in a while. It was dark blue, matching her brown complexion, and it was as if sprinkled with stardust.

"Are you up for today?" She asked carefully, as I sat up in bed pulling on the sleeves of my silk nightshirt.

I knew what she had on her mind. Sarvin's gruelling lecture about the court royals. But as boring as it was, I needed the distraction. I got dressed in a hurry, not noticing Selene fidgeting, stressing about what to do with my hair, as I slipped into trousers and another ruffle blouse.

"You dress more like a man every day," Mayra quietly remarked.

I grimaced in her direction but she was right. The dresses Selene picked were pretty but they felt so wrong on my body. But also wearing long-sleeved blouses, would conveniently hide my tattoo. Only Mayra, Selene and Xander knew and I had no clue how to tell Sarvin, or if I even should.

I looked at myself in the mirror, noticing the subtle red bruise Colt had left on my cheeks. I felt my palms sweat.

"They were the ones you ran from." Mayra carefully noted.

I knew she had thought about it since yesterday. Selene quickly exited the room even if I didn't want her to.

I nodded.

"What will happen to him?" I wasn't sure if Colt would live considering what state Xander had left him in.

"My father was pissed, he will make sure Colt is punished," Mayra said with quick passing anger.

I bit the insides of my cheeks, wondering if I wanted to tell her what I felt, what seeing Colt's face had reminded me of.

"He always told me the day my father died, he would own me. I try to say I ran because I was brave, after all, my father told me to, but if I'm honest, I did it because I was terrified. Knowing all the vile things he would do to me it seemed better to risk my life in the mountains and die alone. Having him touch me..." I paused, whispering the last words as my eyes filled with pain, swallowing the gasping cries that wanted out.

"You will no longer see him again. I will make sure he pays." Mayra's words filled again with soft anger, but her eyes had rage in them, I could see it through the mirror. She meant it.

My lips curled up, "I'm glad you came for me," I finally meant it. 

Yes, I resented her, but it was not her fault. She hadn't been aware that I even existed. Hating her wasn't fair and I was ashamed to have felt it.

Selene came knocking again and I quickly snapped back to a happy face as she entered.

"I'm sorry to do this my lady, but lord Sarvin has requested you for your lecture. I can tell him no..." She quickly said before I interrupted her.

"No it's fine Selene, I need something else to focus on," I assured her.

And I got it. Sarvin didn't ask any questions about what happened the day before. He only informed me that Colt had been locked up, awaiting a sentence. It didn't comfort me and I wasn't sure what would, but Sarvin's tiring lecture quickly made me forget all about it.