You're not Steve

IT'S THE fertilizer-ING AVENGERS

Chapter 45

Peter's Pov:

Oh. My. God.

Thunder cackles.

What has my life become.

Loki is deciding between wearing his hero suit with the green cape and his gold horns, or a bright purple tuxedo.

Tony's wearing a tuxedo covered in a floral pattern, and the folds of the jacket are covered in little jewels.

Bruce is wearing a regular suit and he actually cleaned his glasses.

Steve, much to Loki's dismay, is wearing a kind of tight deep purple long sleeve and dark grey... khakis? I don't really know what his pants are.

Bucky's wearing a suit with rainbow stripes and his hairs pulled back in a very fancy bun Natasha did. He has black eyeshadow on and he kind of looks like a racoon... he did it himself and no one has the heart to tell him.

Bucky and Steve are both wearing Timberland boots.

Thor's wearing a suit covered in tiny poptarts, Crocs with Lightning McQueen on them, and his hair matches Bucky's.

Nat's wearing a black suit with a red bow tie and combat boots, her hairs in a slicked back ponytail.

Wanda's wearing a black to white ombre dress with high top converses. Her hair is flowing down her back with little braids in it.

Pietro and Clint had a darts competition earlier today and the loser had to wear a pair of underpants - but Loki joined the game and, questionably, beat both of them.

So now Pietro is wearing purple and green plaid underwear and Clint's wearing a pair with tacos on them. They're both wearing Crocs as well.

Scott's wearing a navy blue tuxedo with pastel mint Crocs. Sam's wearing a grey tuxedo with little white squares outlined.

Thor decided we should invite Stephen so he's here too wearing his usual blue ropes and red cloak.

I am the only one wearing normal clothes: a plaid shirt with a blue sweatshirt over top and regular grey jeans. I am wearing my Crocs though.

I turn back to Loki and see he's in the bright purple tux with his gold horns on. Compromise I suppose.

We're all standing in the common room. I don't think any of my parents under stand what a Meet the Teacher Night is, it's like they're going to a Red Carpet event.

"Well... I guess we're ready to go!" Tony smiles and we all start shuffling towards the door.

"Wait!" Loki yells holding up a finger.

We all stop and turn to him.

He waves his hands and we all have Aviator sunglasses on.

"Much better. Let's go."

It was agreed earlier that Stephen will portal us to save the outfits from getting wrinkled so Stephen does his thing and we all appear a block from the school.

I take out my phone and send Ned a text

Peter
Where are you?

Ned
Outside the school
You?

Peter
Okay we're coming, wait for us :)

Ned
Of course!!
Can't wait to meet everyone :)))

I smile and put my phone away, "Ned's waiting for us outside the school."

"Well we better hurry then!" Steve says and we start walking.

Once the schools in sight I run ahead to give Ned save warning.

"Hey!" He smiles when he sees me.

We do our hand shake.

"So um, just a heads-" I'm cut off by Ned's mom.

"THE FU-"

"Language" Steve shouts frowning.

"Holy sh-"

"Language." Steve grunts.

"It's the f-"

"Fertilizer!" Clint shouts and Steve whispers "Language"

"-ing Avengers!"

"I can't believe it, I thought Ned was lying!" Ned's mom continues.

Steve turns to Clint, "Wait a second..."

"Why didn't you tell me you weren't lying Ned?" His mom frowns, turning to Ned.

"Now you've made us look all dumb infront of these superheroes"

"What a bad example, he's not normally like this, I assure you."

"Mom" Ned double chins away from his mom. We all do.

"Hawkward..."