Forgotten by My Twin

Chapter 24- forgiveness

Adrianna Jones' POV:

"Hey Ria" he smiled but it looked hesitant.

"Um hey Nio. What are you doing here?" I asked

"Oh nothing. Just- just checking up?" He said but it really sounded more like a question

"You stayed here didn't you" I asked

"Yeah." He scratched the back of his head. "But I- i can go if you want" he said and walked towards the door

"No. Nio stay." I quickly said "if you want to" I added whispering.

"Thank you" he sat at the end of my bed "I'm sorry." He whispered after a while of awkward silence.

"I'm sorry for the way I treated you. I was wrong when I said that you don't deserve me or called you a bitch or anything I said." He took a deep breath before continuing. "I didn't read the letter because I was scared. I was scared that maybe you left because of me. I spent almost a year blaming myself before the defensive part of my mind kicked in and I tried to find any other reason I can for you leaving. At the end, I concluded with it being money. At the corner of my mind, I think some part of me knew that that wasn't the case but then I was always left with no else to blame but me. I guess I really was to blame but in a different way then I thought." He had a sad smile on his face and his face was hung down low.

"When you came back, all I wanted to do was hug you and never let you go but after spending 6 years blaming you for leaving me, I couldn't do that easily. Once again I was sacred that if I let you in, you'd leave again. I am a coward Ria. I. Am. A. Coward. I don't expect you to forgive me because God knows that even I don't forgive myself." I saw his shoulder shake and his eyes were glistening with unshed tears. I could tell he was trying his best to stop them. He was punishing himself. I placed a hand on his shoulder and smiled when he looked at me.

"Nio. I love you. That will never change. No matter what you do or say, the truth is that you are my twin. Someone I will always love. Honestly, i never blamed you. Not for the abuse or how you treated me after I came back. I expected too much from you and that's my fault. Not yours. So if it makes you feel better, then I forgive you- even if I don't believe there is anything to forgive you for. I thought I won't be able to trust you anytime soon but I do. Even if I try to hate you, I can't. You are my brother Nio. It will take me some time to forget everything but I'll try. Forgiving is easier then forgetting. I can't forget everything you did so easily. I am sorry for expecting so much from you" He hugged me and I wrapped my arms around him, as we both cried tears of regret and joy.

"You only expected what I should have given you as your brother. My trust and love. I missed you Ria" Nio whispered as we hugged each other tighter then before.

"I missed you too" I smiled as we pulled away from each other after a while of staying in the same position. We told each other about random things. I told him most of what happened in the past few years. I tried my best to tell him the happy memories with Matt and Mark but he knew that I avoided the abuse. I think he wanted to avoid it too.

"Like I told you before, for a year after you left I blamed myself, thinking that you left because you didn't care about me anymore. I missed you, mama, gramps and even dad because he started to overwork himself. I slowly started to think that I should blame Lucy and I did. But then I thought maybe you left because of dad but that thought went away pretty quickly since dad has always cared for us. I blamed Lucy but I needed someone else to blame so I blamed you thinking that you left for yourself. Deep down I knew it wasn't true but I spent months keeping that thought with me. So eventually I thought that I believed it."

"In my junior year, I joined the football team and started to make friends with the popular groups. Over time I became famous around girls and became a player. I am not proud of that. Honestly, now I realize that I was dumb and stupid for doing that. I ignored and played with girls' feelings. I'm so ashamed of myself for doing that"

"Nio, I'm not proud of you for doing that but the past is in the past. You made some mistakes. Horrible ones at that. But you have to forgive yourself and move forward. Could you please to that for me?" I placed a hand on his cheek and looked at him with soft eyes.

"It's not easy to forgive myself for everything I did. But I'll try. I promise you. Thank you for forgiving me." He whispered

"I want us to go back to how we were years ago Nio. Can we please forget past 7 years and go back to normal? Please" I stared hopefully at him. He quickly pulled me in for another hug which I gladly returned

"Of course. Ria. That's what I want too. But there is one catch. If we forget about the past years, what about Matt and Mark? You did meet them during past years." he said in a playfully serious tone.

"Heyy. Let's forget everything but that shall we?" I punched his shoulder lightly before smiling at him which was received by a grinning face.

This is what I wanted. A playful conversation with my twin without him telling me to go away. I wanted to not be forgotten by my twin. And that is what I've finally got....