Perpetual Infatuation

13: Texts

Sorry for the mistakes.

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Nandini's pov

From the very start I knew talking to him is not a good idea, I'm only digging my own grave, my own source of getting hurt but still I wanted to. I wanted to experience how it feels like to love or maybe, to be loved.

Now that I'm experiencing, it stung, it stung hard.

Moving on from someone who was never yours is actually stupid, hurtful and a lengthy process, because we liked them when they ignored us. We fell for them when they did nothing for us.

I have been trying to do whatever I can in order to not see, think or talk about Manik.

The saddest part in all this is that I can't even say this out loud that it hurts because afterall it was just a crush which everybody have.

People would think that I'm being dramatic to say this, A few years back if somebody would have said that they're not getting over from their crush, I'm sure even I would have just laughed.

Its been 2 weeks since I saw him, 2 weeks of pretending and controlling myself

Today is his birthday, he'd be 22. My hands are itching to type 'Happy Birthday', and I don't know how much more I can control.

After thinking for a while, as always I had to take a decision which would eventually do nothing but increase my already aching heart, I picked up my phone and opened his chat

This is the last time, Nandini.

I typed-
Happiest Bday Manik🎂

It was only a single tick, I waited for him to see the texts but it never happened.

I waited for 2 days yet, only a single tick was there when it clicked in my mind that he has blocked me.

Manik has blocked me.

I felt angry and hurt at the same time, Obviously I couldn't do anything so, I typed again on the very same chat where I have been blocked-

You blocked me! Great
This is the first time someone has blocked me, if I was this much of an embarassment then you could have told me earlier only.

After sending the text, I felt a little relieved. Knowing that he won't be able to see that but I felt good venting out my feeling, I felt light.

Its strange!

The Same Day in Night(Day 16)-

I don't want to write or do anything related to you, but its strange that writing this text is somewhere relieving me from my tangled stupid thoughts.

Day 23-
From the past few days, I was stopping myself from opening this chat as it would only lead to another destruction of mine but as always ended up opening.

I know you don't like me, to be specific I am very irritating. Your words not mine, knowing all this still I'm texting you, God knows why I'm being this desperate!

You would never see these texts, but I need to let go of my feelings in order to get back my life on track.

So, Manik Malhotra get ready to be spammed for lifetime or atleast until I don't feel anything about you.

Day 30-
You might be out of sight, but never out of mind.
Anyways, I'm leaving for Mumbai day after tomorrow as college is going to start soon.

This holiday, I did nothing only laze around in my home. Also, I tried to not think about you in which I failed miserably.

Day 32-
Its getting difficult every passing day.