HIS SIDEKICK

4. Don't tell a soul

*** 4 months later

Junior year is officially over. Cheers to another boring summer and three months filled with late night tears, a guzillion tubs of Ben and Jerry's and weeks in bed. Heavy on the weeks in bed seeing as how my best friend and my only friend now has a boyfriend which doesn't mean she doesn't have time for me it just means she doesn't exactly have time for me.

But that's okay! Soon I'm just going to have to deal with the fact that I'm always going to be alone. I'm never going to get that special guy or that happily ever after that I've always dreamt about. And the sooner that I accept that, the less disappointment and pain I'll feel. I should just live my life the best that I can, and learn to be completely and utterly blissful without a man to make me feel that way.

I sigh, strumming my finger on the mouse of the library computer. Staying cuddled in bed seemed like a great plan , that was until Riley decided to send me a picture of her and her 'perfect little boyfriend' Ryder at Super Joes enjoying very delicious looking sloppy joes. Right then and there I decided I am not going to be the 'sad best friend' living life vicariously through her lucky and beautiful bestie.

So I had to jump my sorry butt out of my bed and straight to...the public library. It wouldn't have been my first choice if I was a popular cheerleader with three boyfriends, but since I'm not the library was my first and only choice ...

"Uh.. hey." My thoughts were suddenly interrupted. 

I looked up to see a very tall and slim figure. He should really think about lifting some weights. Oh my God...wait oh my God!

"H-hi." Oh my God! Why did I do that? Did I just squeak?! Lowering my voice I repeat myself.

"Uh hi." I might be legally impaired, but there is no way I could miss the smile on his face faltering.

"You're Jazlin right?" His torso bent a little bit to signify that he was talking to me, and his curls were perfect as per usual, but his eyes looked watery and were a tad bit red like he had been crying. What on earth could be making the love of my life cry? I guess the love of my life is a strong word for crush, but oh well.

"No...it's Jasmine." 

"So..what ya doing here?" I ask. "Not that it's any of my business, but it's not every day you see Jaxon Scott in the public library." I giggle, playing with my ear... it's something I do when I'm nervous.

"Uh I don't know if I should be insulted by that or not." He pulled a rolling chair out from beside me. "You mind?"

"N-no go ahead." I fidgeted with my fingers under the table, to try and hide my excitement. Jaxon Scott is sitting with me at the public library! God is definitely answering prayers right now!

Although Jaxons facade changed a little bit. He still had the sad glint in his eyes, but he wasn't focused on me...the random girl he chose to sit with at the public library. Instead he was focused on the blank computer screen in front of him.

"Earth to Jaxon." I mumbled, waving a freshly manicured hand in front of his face. One thing about me is you will never catch my nails looking ratchet. He cleared his throat, and combed a hand through his hair.

"Sorry I just- can I tell you something?" His watery eyes turned into full on tears begging to fall. What is going on with this boy?

"Oh my god. A-are you okay?" I don't know what to say.

"Yeah, don't worry about me." He practically jumped out of his chair. "Nevermind I gotta g- I didn't let him finish.

"Woah woah woah! It looks like whatever you're going through is bothering you, maybe it's best if you talk about it." Throwing my hands up in surrender.

He sighed, gripping the chair and sitting down again. "Okay, but you can't tell anybody okay?" He must really be going through it if he's willing to spill his deepest darkest secrets to me of all people, but I nod.

"Life hasn't been easy for me you know?" It was his first sentence and I already wanted to burst into laughter. He's Jaxon Scott, a star athlete, ladies man, and scholar student. His life is perfect!

"I haven't told anybody this, but my parents are going through a divorce." My eyes bulged at his confession.

"I'm so sorry...I had no idea." I gasped out of pure shock.

Yeah, nobody does, but that's not even the worst part. I had a cousin that I used to be close with, her name was Violet." I don't like how he's talking in past tense...

"We we're inseparable as kids and even as pre teens, but time eventually caught up with us and we grew apart like all best friends do. We would occasionally see each other at family gatherings and holidays, but it was never like how it used to be you know?" I nodded again wondering where he was going with this.

"Well long story short she's dead." My eyes widened with how blunt he was able to be.

"She um.. she killed herself." A single tear fell from his eye. "Which never would've happened if I was there for her like i should have been." He continued, allowing another tear to fall.

"I'm so sorry Jaxon. I can't imagine what you must be going through losing someone who meant so much to you, but there's no way you could be blaming yourself for what happened. People who go through with that are going through so much more. She was battling something so much bigger...something you can't blame yourself for." He looked up from the blank computer screen and appointed his gaze to me though I wish he wouldn't have.

One look at the tears in his eyes and his feelings instantly erupted inside of me. I could feel everything he was feeling. I imagined what it would be like to lose Riley to suicide, to find out through school or the news, blaming myself for not being there to stop her, and not seeing any point of living anymore. So I began to cry. And I mean cry!

Tear after tear came crashing down my cheeks the more I thought about it. "Woah...why are you crying?" His doleful expression soon morphed into fear and before I knew it his arms were around me. I couldn't stop sobbing, let alone fathom the fact that Jaxon Scott had his arms around me.

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

What do you do when someone you don't know, but have a mutual respect with tells you a deep and meaningful thing about themselves, that you never expected them to share with you? Comfort them, and keep your lips sealed.