CHANGE

TWENTY

LOUIS

"I just think we should be making him talk more you know, getting him to stop avoiding things". Louis wakes up to Harry's concerned voice and he keeps his eyes closed, eavesdropping. They're talking about him again, ugh, he thinks, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. When will they learn.

"It's not good for him" Harry continues. "I don't want him to....".

"To what Harry?" Louis hears Liams reply. "Because what could possibly be worse huh? He's a completely different person, he hates being touched and he's fucking self harming" Louis flinches at the truthful words and shudders, praying that Harry didn't feel it. "The Louis we knew is gone".

"I know" Harry says, and Louis feels his shaky breathing. "I just.".

"You just what?" Liam snaps. "Just started to realise this is all your fucking fault? Want to take the guilt away a bit?, he's my best friend Harry and you're never going to be able to make this right so why don't you just quit while you're ahead!".

Louis flinches at Liams harsh tone and flicks his eyes open, looking at Liam angrily. " Will you stop playing the fucking blame game!" He growls, not being able to take any more. "This is my life and you're turning it into some sort of competition. Get a grip". He shakes his head and gives Liam a disappointed look. "I swear to god I wish this fucking reunion wasn't happening". He swings his legs over Harry, gently pulling himself over him and heading to Liams
bathroom.

"And stop fucking blaming Harry" he calls out. "It's not his fault I'm fucked up".

...

They don't speak of the incident again after Louis comes out of the bathroom, they just watch shit tv and chill out together.

As the clock reaches half eleven Liam looks up, noticing the time. "Well, I'm gonna head off to bed" he says, glancing at the boys. "There's two spare guest rooms. So fight it out amongst yourselves" he looks at Niall. "Ni can bunk in with me though, he doesn't kick, unlike some people" he throws a look at Louis and Louis holds his hands up in defence. "Hey, just practicing my footie skills!". He may be mad at Liam still but he's decided he isn't going to let it interfere with the band. Why should they suffer for his mistakes and feel the burden of his own problems.

Liam scoffs and puts an arm around Niall as the lad gets up, and they soon disappear into Liams room.

"I'll um, take the sofa" Harry says, looking and Louis and Zayn. "You two take the guest rooms".

Louis looks at Harry softly. "You sure Harry? You took the sofa at my place too". Harry nods. "Positive".

Zayn just shrugs. "Well I'm not going to try convince you otherwise, I can't stand sleeping on sofas". He bids goodnight to Harry and Louis before heading to one of the rooms, leaving just Louis and Harry.

"Well goodnight Haz" Louis says quietly. "I-" he stops himself. "Sleep well". He quickly scuttles off, leaving Harry to his thoughts.

...

HARRY

Harry silently cries as salty tears roll down his cheeks, and he sniffs slightly. He waited until everyone had been in bed for about half an hour, and then let his feelings out.

Although Liams words were true that didn't mean that they didn't hurt him. He knows he fucked up, he knows it's his fault. And hearing it just makes him feel even worse.

He wipes his eyes gently, damp eyelashes gently touching his soft skin slightly as he blinks afterwards.

For a moment he feels as though he's 16 again, crying over a boy. But this is worse, he's a man now, and he's sat crying on his band mates sofa crying about a mistake he made six years ago, a mistake that ruined someone's life. He's so going to hell for this one.