TVD/TO Oneshots

Can't Sneak Out (Damon Salvatore)

Written for Fictober 2022 on Tumblr!

Prompt: "Not on my watch!"

Summary: When yet another massive supernatural threat comes to Mystic Falls, Y/N is ready to go out and help the rest of the Mystic Falls Scooby Gang beat it. Unfortunately, a bad cold ends up messing with their witchy-woo enough that they need to stay home and rest, instead. Since Y/N is the kind of person to go out and push themselves to the limits anyway, Damon's been tasked with keeping them home and resting, and he's taking his job very seriously.

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"Damon, if you don't get out of my way-"

"What? What are you gonna do? You're sick as a dog right now Y/N, you couldn't even hex me if you tried!"

I growled in frustration and threw my hands up in the air. "Our friends are out there risking their lives right now! I can't stand being cooped up in here, so get the hell out of my way."

"No."

"Ugh!" I threw my hands up in the air, but Damon didn't budge. I huffed and stomped around a bit, but his expression didn't soften at all. Finally, I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Fine. If you're gonna be such a pain in the ass, then I'm gonna go take a nap instead of spending time in here with you. Goodnight."

I spat the last word, then turned on my heel and headed for my bedroom. In truth, I had absolutely no intention of taking a nap. I just needed my babysitter to think that was the plan so I could sneak out behind his back while he wasn't paying attention.

I slammed my bedroom door behind me, then rustled the sheets loudly like I was flopping into bed. I waited a few beats, ruffled the sheets again like I was laying there and trying to get comfortable, then waited again. Finally, when I decided I'd waited long enough, I crept across the floor to the window.

Slowly, carefully, and like I'd done more than once in high school, I eased the window open. It was completely silent, and I stepped out onto the roof with practiced ease. I walked to the edge of the roof and eased over it until I hung on by just my fingers, my feet dangling above the porch. I still really didn't feel great thanks to my cold, so it was a little harder than usual, but nothing I couldn't handle.

Finally, when I felt confident in my position, I let go and dropped down to the porch in triumph.

I found Damon standing in front of me with his arms crossed, staring at me and clearly not impressed.

"Did you really think that trick was gonna work on me?" he deadpanned.

"Dammit Damon! Get out of my way, I'm going to help my friends."

I tried to storm past him, but I didn't get very far. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder, then started heading for the front door of the house.

"Not on my watch!" he said, his tone entirely too cheery for the mood I was currently in.

Once we were back in the house, he dumped me unceremoniously on the couch, then started heading for the kitchen.

"You lay there and rest," he ordered. "I'll make you some soup or something-"

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I finally demanded, shouting despite my sore throat as I popped back onto my feet and glared at him. He stopped in the kitchen doorway and stared back at me with a raised eyebrow, but my scowl only got more fierce.

"What do you mean?" he asked, his tone making it clear he thought I was being crazy. I clenched my fists and took a few furious steps towards him.

"I mean, who the hell are you, because you're sure as hell not being Damon Salvatore right now!" Damon scoffed and rolled his eyes, and I knew he had some witty retort on the tip of his tongue, but I jumped in before he could say it. "I've personally seen you cajole Bonnie into the middle of danger and heart-stopping spells when she's on the verge of death. You'll send Matt off to be bait with no defense at the drop of a hat. Tyler, Caroline, even Stefan! If they can be of help, you don't try to stand in their way, even if they should be resting instead of world-saving. But with me? You're a helicopter parent!"