What have I done...?

Chapter 30

"My God, no wonder she has been so preoccupied since the accident. Having to deal with all of this on her own and then being afraid to share it with anyone would drive anyone to do might near anything."

"Yes, it would. And the darkness that she gets from Lissa, that I told you about, that is most of what is endangering her sanity."

She sighed. "I wish that she had felt that she could come to me with all of this. But given just how out of the realms of what I am used to dealing with that all of this is. She probably A.) Didn't want to bother or burden me with what she would have considered her problems. Or B.) She would have been too afraid that someone would overhear her and put Lissa in danger. Like what happened with Victor Dashkov. She has always taken Lissa's security, health, sanity, safety, and life to heart. Even when they were children, she felt that it was up to her to make sure that Lissa had as near a perfect of a life as possible. No matter what doing so did to Rose herself."

"Yes, I haven't known her for very long but all of that sounds like the way that she thinks. She takes far too much responsibility onto her shoulders when she needs to let someone else help her carry the load with her. Thankfully Dimka is going to be there to help her with everything from now on."

"That's good. I am glad that she has him to help her carry the massive load that she takes upon herself."

"Me too."

"When will I be able to talk to Rose? I do need to debrief her, but mostly I just need to make sure that my little girl is all right."

I smiled because I was so glad that Alberta loved my little baby cousin as if she were her own child. Because Rose's actual biological mother sure as hell had never loved or cared one whit about Rose. Which is her loss, no one else's, just Janine's.

Because Rose sure as hell is not missing out on anything by not knowing Janine Hathaway. That is for damn sure. She MIGHT have been missing out on something if Janine were a different type of person and a hell of a lot better mother. But with her being the type of person that she is now, my little cousin wasn't missing out on a single damn thing with having no relationship with Janine Hathaway.

"Let's give them a few hours, that way she can clean up, eat, and get a little rest before we show up."

"All right. Are you going to stay here the entire time?"

"No, I am going to go to my room in the hotel, feed, and get some rest myself. Because just like with Dimka, I have been up since Rose and Christian left the ski lodge. And it has been a very long several exhausting days for all of us."

"I know exactly how you feel. I haven't slept once since I found out that she was missing either." She shook her head.

I chuckled. "I was doing my dead level best to keep Dimka sane while Rose was away. And with her being in constant danger the whole time that she was away... Well, I am telling you right now that keeping him calm was in no way an easy task. The calmest that he was, the whole time that they were separated, was when they were talking to each other. And every time that something happened to her... he would almost lose his ever-loving mind. I mean the head strigoi here hit her, A LOT, and every single time that he did, Dimka would almost lose his mind. After witnessing what he went through I am a little afraid of meeting and falling in love with my own soul mate." I chuckled lightly.

"He has never been very good at holding it together if she was hurt or in danger or pain of any kind. Not since the day that they first met." She informed me.

I laughed for a moment. "He still isn't."

Now she laughed. "That's good because it just proves how much he loves and adores her."