She is Fatal to Death (Standalone Story)

Chapter 50 (A Kiss From The Universe)

Renata

Months came and went after St. Joseph's annual celebration. That time of rejoicing was certainly a night to remember. Everyone danced together, laughing and talking and maybe a little bit of drunk crying was involved.

Renata remembered leaving that event feeling so much lighter, partly because she let go of a lot of her hurt from Diamond and Rocio, and mostly because Tahoma carried her all the way home.

They were pretty much fine at this point. Sometimes, it was strange to realize her sister, and her best friend were over a decade deep into an intensely passionate marriage, but she more so felt a great relief that they were alive at all. They both played such important roles in her life. Besides that weird moment of messy and indecisive hearts, Renata was never given a reason to distrust them or to feel unsafe in their embrace, and she yearned to have that feeling back and would fight tooth and nail to keep it.

Seeing the joy in the relationship which survived years and years of apocalyptic crises filled her newly healing heart with hope for herself and her new partner, Tahoma.

He, who continued to surprise her and care for her like no other. Who encaptured her heart as easily and with as much confidence as he took his next breath.

"I love you, priya," he told her in the darkness of their bedroom only weeks ago. "And I'll whisper it here, shout it at the mountaintops—whatever you want, as long as you say it back."

Renata remembered her tightening throat and burning eyes and also the way her mouth wouldn't stop curving into that goofy, delirious smile. She turned around and kissed him in the shadows, would kiss him in the blueness and anywhere else as long as he kissed her back. "I love you so much, Tahoma. I don't know what I'd do without you."

He wiped at the tears she hadn't known were falling. His own voice was hoarse with overwhelming joy. "You'd be just fine, because you're the strongest, most fearless woman I know, and you've proven a thousand times over that you are the definition of resilience." He laughed. "But I'd be a sloppy mess without you." They laughed together.

"You'll love me even when I'm sad?" She was referring to the unshakeable depression and axiety that has plagued her as of late. It came and went just like those months, reminding her of the despair she endured following her first dance with death.

Despite being grateful for this new chance at life, she still had moments where she felt no hope. She was sometimes convinced she would drown in her survivor's guilt, believing she should have died with the rest of those who suffered from the effects of her battle with Angel. While she knew it was all over, none of what happened these last couple of years would ever leave her, not fully, just like Death.

And it was easier said than done to cope with.

Yet...

Yet.

Everyday it got just the smallest bit easier. In the face of terrifying mental stagnancy or deterioration, she continued to live, to make the effort to care for her body and soul in any way she could manage.

And with moments like those, when Tahoma listened to her vulnerable question and simply responded with, "I'll love you even more then. I promise." It meant everything to her. Those moments scattered the shadows, allowing the light to flood in and cleanse her from her inner turmoil. Then, only then could she indulge in those rare times of uninterrupted peace.