Heavenly Simulation: Tales of Demons and Gods

Chapter no.36 Advice on Courtship

Shen Xiu found little joy in teaching, especially with a classroom filled to the brim with commoners.

In her eyes, they were little more than time-wasters, destined to be nothing but meat shields for the more powerful. She caught a glimpse of her nephew, Shen Yue, seated next to Ye Ziyun.

"Good job, brat," she thought approvingly. "Now, impress her just like I showed you."

As she lectured, Shen Xiu couldn't help but notice the glances thrown her way by the male students.

It wasn't surprising, of course.

Her beauty was unmatched, and she was well aware of the allure she held.

Being seen with her, gaining her favor, could open doors to the influential circles of the Sacred Family.

While she understood the draw of her presence, acknowledging it as part of the natural order of things, there was a line that irritated her to no end.

Commoners and those without talent—those she considered the dregs of society—dared to look at her with desire in their eyes.

"Know your place," she seethed internally, her disdain for their overstepping bounds clear in her mind.

With a flourish, Shen Xiu picked up a piece of chalk and strode to the blackboard.

As she began outlining the various classes within Glory City on the board, her intention was clear: to remind everyone of their place in the hierarchy.

"Let's make things clear," she stated, her voice carrying a weight of authority that silenced the room. "In Glory City, not everyone is equal."

.....

As Shen Xiu continued her lecture, aiming her words like arrows to pierce the confidence of the commoners in the Fighter Assistant Class, Nie Li couldn't help but find himself in a mix of despair and stress. "Courting Shen Xiu?" he mumbled to himself, the absurdity of the situation making him chuckle.

"Fantastic. Died a virgin in the first timeline, and now my grand romantic quest is to charm one of the most standoffish women in Glory City."

He sighed deeply, pondering the ridiculousness of it all.

"And I can't even use the age difference as an excuse. She's only three years older. I am physically 15, she is 18."

A wry smile formed on his lips as he considered the peculiar twist of fate. "Though technically, I'm the older one here, given my whole dying-and-coming-back-to-life escapade."

Nie Li's thoughts wandered to the concept of courtship and age.

"Our ages should be perfect for courtship, not that it makes this any less daunting." He remembered all the arranged marriages within his own class during the five years in his past life.

It seemed everyone was getting hitched left and right.

"Even Lu Piao, the eternal skirt-chaser, managed to snag a fiancée, while I perfected the art of being a bachelor."

He sniffed, a playful glint in his eyes as he considered his situation.

"So, how does one court the un-courtable Shen Xiu?"

Nie Li's brain was spinning with funny, yet terrible scenarios of him trying to woo Shen Xiu. He could just see himself tripping over his own words, trying to spit out something smooth and instead ending up looking like a complete fool. Or even worse, trying to charm her and somehow managing to offend her instead, which, considering it was Shen Xiu, seemed like a very real danger.

"Maybe flowers?" he wondered, but quickly dismissed the idea. "No, that's way too common, and she doesn't seem like the flower-loving type. What am I supposed to do, serenade her under the moonlight?" The thought alone made him chuckle. "Poetry? Yeah right, as if I could pen anything that wouldn't have her rolling her eyes at me. I can imagine it now: 'Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm on a mission, so could you maybe not hate me?' That'll surely sweep her off her feet," he thought with a mix of humor and a touch of desperation.

He sighed deeply, realizing just how big of a mountain he had to climb. "I'm a cultivator, not some kind of ladies' man. How in the world am I supposed to do this without it turning into a complete disaster?"

Leaning over to Lu Piao, Nie Li whispered, "Hey, man, got any tips on how to court a woman?"

Lu Piao beamed, confident. "Of course! You've asked the right guy."

Nie Li raised an eyebrow, already doubting this decision. "Feels more like the wrong guy, honestly."

"Just trust me," Lu Piao insisted.

"That's what I'm scared of," Nie Li muttered under his breath.

"First tip," Lu Piao began, "Compliments! Women love them. Say something like, 'You're a fairy descended from heaven.'"

Nie Li snorted in response. "What's she gonna say? 'Which dumpster did you climb out of?'"

Lu Piao tried again, "What about poetry? 'Roses are red, violets are blue...'"

Nie Li cut him off, "And end it with 'I'm bad at poetry, and guess what, so are you?' Not happening."

Lu Piao laughed. "Okay, how about showing her how strong you are? Chicks dig strength."

Nie Li just shook his head. "Against a Demon Spiritualist like her? Might as well arm wrestle a twig."

"Gifts, then? Girls love gifts. How about a nice bracelet?" Lu Piao suggested next.

Nie Li replied with a dry tone, "Yeah, so she can have something to strangle me with? Pass."

Lu Piao then threw out, "Serenade her?"

"And get a bucket of water for my efforts? No way," Nie Li shot back.

After a moment, Lu Piao slumped back, then perked up again. "Just be yourself then."

Nie Li looked at him like he'd grown a second head. "And achieve what? Instant rejection?"

Lu Piao chuckled. "Alright, maybe try being someone else for a day?"

Despite the ridiculousness of their conversation, Nie Li found himself laughing along with his friend. "Thanks for the 'advice', Lu Piao. Seems like I'll need a miracle more than a game plan."

"Miracles happen, Nie Li. Just look at us, sharing a class," Lu Piao quipped with a smile.

"Yep, the miracle of surviving your advice," Nie Li joked back, and the two shared a hearty laugh.

As Nie Li and Lu Piao whispered and chuckled together at the back of the class, they were so caught up in their conversation that they didn't notice Shen Xiu's sharp eyes on them. Being a Silver rank Demon Spiritualist, Shen Xiu had honed her senses to an exceptional level. Her mind and body worked in flawless unity, giving her an almost sixth sense for detecting even the slightest disturbance. Her eyes, especially keen, could pick up on the smallest details from afar.

In the midst of Nie Li and Lu Piao's quiet laughter, Shen Xiu's voice suddenly pierced the air, clear and commanding. "You two in the back, would you care to share what's so amusing with the rest of the class?"