Golden CAPTAIN || Ateez *PIRATE AU*

๏Apology๏

Yun SeByeol's POV~

I've already finished my dinner and was now laying on the main deck.

It was midnight and everyone was in their rooms sleeping or doing whatever they pleased.

I've woken up earlier after having a sleep of 4 hours which was nice but now I wasn't tired enough to sleep again.

Yeosang first opposed the idea of me sleeping outside alone and was ready to talk to Hongjoong about it. But somehow I convinced him that I was alright.

I mean it's not like I had anything better to do, I can just talk to my moon and enjoy this peace for a while.

I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, I just hope that things would go better than today and that the meeting will finish alright without me having to explain them everything in detail. I wasn't ready for that yet. I wasn't ready to open such a dark part of me. Yet.

Hopefully, just a overview of this whole situation would suffice.

Tonight was even colder than last night. The wind was flowing in such a way that it raised goosebumps in my arms even though they were covered by the blanket which was provided by Yunho.

He was adamant of not letting me sleep in the open without anything to cover myself with. He said that what I did wasn't right but it wasn't so wrong either to punish me in this way.

I'm really grateful for that. Because if I didn't had this blanket right now than I would have probably freezed to death until the end of this night.

Chuckling at my own thoughts, I stared up at the sky. Even in such cold weather I can't help but adore the beautiful creations of god. The dark sky was filled with stars in every part you could put your eyes to. Some stars formed some different kind of shapes while others were just scattered mindlesly.

I stared at the moon with unwanted heaviness in my heart which I didn't knew how to get rid of. I was feeling a lot of things at this moment of time but the most comprehensible feeling was emptiness. I felt empty.

God, how I was scared of myself. How I wanted some guidance from someone, anyone but I knew I didn't needed it.
I knew I could deal and handle everything on my own, without needing any help from someone. But I wanted it. Why are feelings so complicating?!? Can't I just feel fulfilled for once.

Sighing slightly, I stood up from my laying position and rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand while my other was busy in fixing my hair.

I wasn't sleepy and even if I would've been I knew I still would had some problem with falling asleep. I really need to ask Yeosang for some sleep medications.

I slowly and gently stood from my place, wrapping the blanket around me so that I wouldn't get cold and made my way towards the railings of the ship.

Holding them I looked down in the deep black water which looked like it was emitting light. It was flowing parallel to the ship and the sound of it moving was heaven to my ears. The hormony and melody of this everlasting dark sea with its mysterious depths and dark beauty eased a little part of me which I knew existed but never really bothered about.

The reflecting illumination of the moon and stars was such a captivating sight that I wasn't able to focus on anything else.

The salty yet fresh air carried a sense of unknown possibilities which excited yet scared me.

Oh how I wish to be a part of these ethereal creations. Maybe one day, one day I can.

Turning my focus off this magnificant environment, I thought what the other's might be doing right now.