ARRANGED TO LOVE

Chapter 18 :New start

Aisha POV:
As I was done with beautifying myself I prepared to exit the room. The moment I opened the door I found Ishan standing out of it and i froze.

Did he heard me cry ?
Am I looking like I cried.
Questions like these started coming in my mind.

" Can I come in?" He asked with strained voice.

"oh! ya sure why Not" I said and made way for him to come in. As he came in he looked at the whole place as if searching for something important.

" what are you looking for ?" I asked

" I am looking for the person who stayed here" Ishan said.

" what are you saying Ishan , its me who is staying here from past few weeks" I said confused thinking what did he wanted to say .

" No you are not the person who lives here she was way Independent than you, she didn't needed a guy to prove her worth, she knew how to stand up for herself" he said looking straight into my eyes.

" what do you want to say Ishan ,just spill it over now" I said,now annoyed.

" I just wanted to say that you lost yourself over Addy, Aisha" Ishan said with a strained tone like something was hurting him, breaking him apart.

It was as if every nerve in my body stooped working.
how can he know it? was it so prominent?

" what are you saying Ishan stop imagining things" I said looking anywhere but him trying to prove him wrong.

" you know what Aisha, you forgot that I am your friend and I know you better than anyone" he said arguing.

" It's nothing of your concern ishan, I can handle it" I shouted.

"Yes why not ,because if crying for him in secret means handling it then you are handling it quite well Aisha " he said sarcastically.

" I told you I can handle it Ishan and how will you know what love is when you never loved anyone" I said angrily and his face fell, guilt consumed me.

"Ishan I...."

" Yes you are right ,how will I know what love is? because I never loved anyone, because I never loved the girl who never loved me back. people say action speaks louder than words but she provided me wrong because my action was never understood by her." He said angrily while his eyes showed he was purely broken by my sentence or by talking about her.
" I am....sorry" I said feeling guilty and verge of tears because of frustration. He let out a breath to calm himself down.

"Do you know Aisha Sometimes it's ok to let your guard down ,to feel weak ,to act like everything is falling apart because we are humans Aisha, we have feelings, there is nothing wrong in showing what you feel" Ishan said trying to calm himself down.

"But I can't!! I was never taught about it ,I was always taught to be strong or act strong and never let world see your weak side, i was never taught to let my guard down because people take advantage of you when you are weak" I said irritated and trying hard not to cry

"somethings are not taught Aisha, we have to learn them, I understand that you should not let your guard down in front of strangers because people miss use the opportunity but what's wrong with letting your guard down in front of me? Have i become a stranger to you?" he said trying to make me understand.

" No!!you are not a stranger Ishan and I am sorry you felt that way but it's just that....you know i am not good with words, i don't know how to express myself" I said trying to control my tears.

" We are friends Aisha, you don't have say things, i can see it in your eyes, all I want is you sharing what bothers you" he said and then I could no longer hold back and started crying because of frustration.