Shatter ✔ #TheWattys2017

13. Home

The sun peeked through the blinds, dancing across my eye lids like they always do in the early morning. Rubbing my eyes, I took a look around my room.

Today I decided I was going to move back home. I couldn't stay in the pack house anymore now that Nic was home. We were both going through things and we needed each other right now. And i needed to get away from everything and everyone here. I shouldn't want to leave Deacon and i don't.. he will be here without me.. we cant be seen together anyway though and having him near will just make it worse. He is going to hate me when he realizes i moved out and never told him..

All of these continuous disasters isnt even my fault but im taking the short end of the stick. I know.. pity party for one.

Whatever.

Taking a shower as swiftly as possibly, i managed to get myself clean and out in three minutes. No shaving. Sometimes a girl is just too depressed to shave. Not like im trying to impress anyone anyways...

I took a shower after last night but you cant be too careful around nosey wolves..

wiping the fog from the mirror, i took a long look at my gaunt features and dark circled eyes. These emotions have taken a toll on my physical health. Still pretty.. but it lie under a mask of emotional deterioration. Sighing longingly, i dressed in the plain black fitted tee and tight ripped up jeans laying on the toilet seat.

My wet hair dripped down my newly donned fitted tee, wetting my back and breasts, water dripping down to my bare feet. I towel dried my hair as much as i could, my eyes trained on my red toenails.. not wanting to see my reflection any longer. My hair wasnt my biggest concern today. It could dry on its own in waves. Hanging my hair towel on the door hook, i exited the bathroom letting the steam waft in my wake and began packing up all my things, which wasnt much.

Clothes.. photos.. frames.. memories.. books.. just the essentials i brought here not too long ago. My room at my parents was still the way i left it anyways.
Reaching for my photo album, a few pictures fell out along with a framed one, which caught my attention. It was a picture of Me, Deacon, Zaryn and Nic three years ago when just our families went camping. You could see our parents way in the back ground... it seemed like they were having a serious discussion while all four of us kids, we were covered in mud, huge grins plastered from ear to ear. Deacon always beside me.. zaryn directly behind me standing next to Nic.. but now looking at this picture i just now noticed.... Zaryn.

His eyes were looking down at the top of my head with a smile on his lips. He was staring at me.

Oh by the moon, if id only known of his love for me then... if he had only known of mine for him..

I packed the rest of my belongings just in time for Nic to show up at my door. The door swung open after a rapid few knocks. I turned briskly to greet him with a broad smile. His eyes were still tired looking but the smile he gave me reached them.

We were both living with broken hearts inside our bodies.. these bodies that kept smiles on their faces while their insides churned with black tar, gumming up our airways and shriverling our hearts to a nothingness... zombies of sorts. Walking, breathing, smiling for others to see while inside we were dead.

"Hey sis. You ready to go?" He leaned against the door frame, glancing around at the fewboxes and two large suitcases i had laid out ready to go, the only thing left in this bare room aside for the furniture it came with. It hadnt been long that ive lived in the pack house, but the memories here in this room were already horrible ones i never wanted to think about again.

"Yeah. Im ready." I smiled up at my brother, his dark brown hair sticking up in al directions as if he had tossed and turned all night.. but it was a good look on him. His fan club would love it. I laughed to myself as i thought of their faces once they discovered he had found his supposed mate..