Waiting To Exhale

Fifty-two

Mason slaps me right back only ten times harder. I feel the revolting taste of copper when I involuntarily bite down on my bottom lip. "Let me go!" I scream with everything in me. "Get off me you crazy sonofabitch! Get off!" I don't know what it is but something in me just snaps. I refuse to let him do this to me again. I just can't.

"That's how you treat me? After everything I've done for your ungrateful ass?!" I hear him unzip his pants.

"I won't let you!" Tears stain my cheeks. I fight harder but despite my best efforts, I feel myself begin to tire and grow weak. Mason is stronger than me so it requires more energy to fight him off. I'm not going to beg him though. I've done enough of that in my lifetime. I've had enough of rolling over for people.

First I rolled over for my mom when she abandoned me. I rolled over for my dad when he drank too much and came home to beat me or make me do his bidding. I rolled over when I had to get a job. I rolled over when Alfonso raped me. I've just been rolling over too much.

Somehow I manage to squeeze my way out of Mason's grip. Unfortunately, I take one step and I'm sent falling to the ground. Mason is on top of me in seconds. He struggles to hold my arms down as I fight against him. I feel something against my hand so I pick it up and drill it into his face. He screams but doesn't get off. Blood oozes between his fingers and mine. I realize I left a piece of glass when I was cleaning up. If Mason wasn't angry before he is now but I'm not worried. He's not going to kill me. I'm carrying his child and right now that's the only leverage I have over him. So I use it. "If you do this I'll kill myself."

He laughs a very bitter laugh. "You won't."

"I will. I don't have anything to live for. I'll do it. I almost did and I would have if you hadn't got out of bed." He doesn't move. "Don't test me!"

He gets off of me and stands up, as do I, not liking the feeling of him hovering over me. The piece of glass is still etched between my fingers at my side. "You know what-" Mason comes after me and without a second thought I stick my arm out, plunging the piece of glass in his chest. He pauses and I take full charge over his momentary weakness by rushing to the cabinets and pulling out a knife. I'm just sick of it. I won't let him kill me and I don't want to feel forced to do it to myself. I have to end this.

As the knife tears through flesh, a painful scream fills the penthouse. Clear shock is displayed across Mason's face and I know mine mirrors his as I realize the painful scream came from me. Mason falls to the ground. Once the shock wears off I rush to the phone and dial 9-1-1.

"911 what's your emergency?"

"I-I stabbed my boyfriend. He-he t-tried to attack me."

"Ma'am is he still breathing?"

"I don't know. I don't know,"

*************

I sit in the waiting room curled up in Anthony's arms. Joe sits across from me. "There was so much blood. I don't know what I was thinking. He just came at me. There was so much blood..." I mumble to myself.

The door to the waiting room burst open and Jen comes storming in. "You bitch!" She screams looking me dead in my face. Her long weave is pulled up in a messy bun and her face isn't caked in makeup like usual but she still looks gorgeous. She must have rushed over here. Frankie is behind her yelling at her to calm down. Jen doesn't want to listen.

Anthony stands up. "Aye broad-"

"Anthony sit down," Joe demands.

"But Joe-"