AM13 Outbreak Shorts

Outbreak - Fourteen

My heart thunders noisily as I stuff things into a bag, without even looking at what I'm packing. This is horrible, I feel utterly dreadful about what I'm doing, but it's what Dad wants. When I agreed to go along with his crazy plan, the relief was so evident in his face, I truly do believe this might be his dying wish, which is the main reason I'm still going along with it.

Plus, the distraction is good. I don't want to imagine my dad's death any more than I already am.

I flick the TV on in the background, just to make some noise burst into the room before I feel compelled to scream, and since I've had it on rolling news channels for the last few I shouldn't be as surprised as I am when a newscaster bursts to life on the screen.

"The quarantine, currently being referred to as 'The Lockdown' is now set to start this Friday, which has surprised some..."

I gasp loudly and fall onto my bed sheets, my eyes staring widely at her as she continues to talk, as if only to me.

"The recommendation is still for anyone showing signs of sickness to get to the specialist medical facility, and of course anyone else will need to ensure that they've registered where they will be residing during the quarantine on the Government website, to make sure they have food delivered to them..."

Nope, I can't listen to it anymore, it's all making me want to throw up in my mouth. I turn the screen to black and check my bag once more. As I touch all the items within the backpack, it's automatic, as if I no longer really exist, I'm simply a robot, acting out the commands that have been thrown my way.

Then, I wait.

I sit, and I wait. Time ticks past, the second hand races noisily, and with each passing moment the time comes nearer for me to actually take that dreaded action. Thinking about it, and actually raising my butt off that bed to snap into action are two very different things. My mind races back and forth, wondering if this is the right move for me. I mean, where will I even go? Certainly not to Zac's house, I don't even know where he lives for one thing. He's far too elusive and mysterious to give me that sort of information. I guess I have Emma, she's given me her address, but this is a lot to put on a brand new friend, and her poor parents. There's no guarantee that they'll even have me, considering my father is infected...

Infected and going to die.

That thought stabs me painfully, it digs me in places I didn't even know existed. I'm doing my best not to break down right now, when I have so much to worry about, but it's really hard. I feel like I need a wall around me, binds simply to hold me together.

When the clock hits 4AM, I finally decide that it's time to go. It's late enough for me to sneak out undetected, but early enough for the sun to be rising soon, ensuring I don't get too cold. It's definitely a case of now or never because I can already feel my brain gearing up to talk me out of it.

I tuck my backpack onto my back and I grab a piece of paper on the side. Much as I want to sneak out with nothing, just for a clean break, I can't. I don't want to destroy my mother any more. Even with my dad's explanation, it might not be enough. But as I stand there with my favorite ink pen, poised above the paper, inspiration deserts me. How can I say goodbye, when it could very well be forever? How do I apologize appropriately when I'm abandoning a sinking ship?

'I'm sorry , Rachael x'

I stare down at the words, knowing that they'll never be enough, but also aware that nothing ever will be. Then, I turn with a heavy sadness in my heart and I make my way towards the door.

Just until all of this is over, I try my best to convince myself. I can be home soon enough, I only need to keep away until it's safe.

A deep chill runs up and down my spine as I click the door shut behind me, and a wave of tiredness washes over me. It's amazing that during the time I could sleep, I was far too wired to even lie down, but now that there's not a hope in hell my eyes want to close. Still, there's no point in getting bogged down, all I need to do is keep on walking...

Eventually, I flicker my eyes upwards to spot the glittering sands of the beach stretched out in front of me. It seems I can't keep away even when I want to. Giving up on finding somewhere else to wait out the night, I plonk my butt in the softness of the beach, and gaze up at the rising sun.

Another day is starting, only this one is the most dramatic of my life so far.

As the yellow glow overcomes the ocean, I return to thinking about Zac once more. I've been trying my best to keep him out of my mind while my world goes to hell, but with nothing else to think about but misery, it seems fruitless to resist. However, as I recall the first time I sat on these sands, waiting for him to come and speak to me, the memory has a dream-like quality to it. It's almost as if it happened to someone else now.

Who knows what will happen next; with Dad, with me, with everyone in this town. The only thing I can be certain of is that nothing will ever be the same again.