Chapter 35: Part 2

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"We don't have to do this, Sorrel. If you are too uncomforta-"

"I want to try, Arlo." I couldn't help how clipped my voice was. I didn't need him attempting to talk me out of it and with how I felt I knew he might be capable of doing just that. I needed to push forward, I needed to get used to him. My heart thumped almost unpleasantly in my chest but it didn't matter if it did or not. I was so tired of feeling like this. So out of control of my feelings, so anxious about my life.

He let out a small breath, squeezing my hand as he looked at me. "Your comfort means everything to me, Sorrel. If this step is too much for, I want to know." His words sent a warmth simmering through my chest. I truly appreciated his concern despite the fact I didn't want him to try and convince me to tell him that I didn't want to go out on the date with him.

"If it is I would tell you but no matter how anxious I feel, I want to try." I squeezed his hand back, trying to repress the shivers I got from touching him. I almost craved the feeling of comfort and security that he brought me despite how it made my anxiety spike. I wasn't sure what it was about the touch that gave me the feeling but I didn't want to deconstruct it too much. "I can't live my life being scared about getting into relationships." I didn't want to live my life with that type of fear.

"So you plan on being in a lot of relationships then?" There was a heavy edge of teasing to his voice and despite how I felt my cheeks heat up, my lips tugged up into a smile.

"Why not? This is going so well that I thought I would try another." I looked at him, trying to keep my face even and he didn't even try to hide his amusement as he started laughing loudly at my rather sarcastic words. The sound was rich and rolled over my skin like velvet. I shivered as I felt another blush crawl up my cheeks as I watched him.

He looked at me, his brown eyes warm and soft as he gave me a smile, chuckles still rumbling from him. I felt that look down to my very core and it felt strangely intimate to me, making my cheeks flush worse. "You have no idea..." He didn't complete his sentence and the words were quite but had a heaviness to them that made my heart jump in my chest. "We should head inside. I need to say goodbye to Madeline."

"Good luck with that. She's going to be enthralled with that movie." I could just imagine her standing in the middle of the living room, her eyes wide as she watched the movie, completely drawn into the story that was unfolding on the screen.

"I know but she will be upset if I don't try." He grinned and I nodded slowly. She would throw an ever loving fit if he did.

"She would." I swallowed slightly as I let his hand go to remove my seat belt. "I think we should be okay to let you come out every day if you wanted." Saying the words made my heart beat faster with both excitement and anxiety. Despite all the anxiety that I felt when I was around him, I missed him when he wasn't there. He was like a calm beacon for me, something that I looked towards to find a moment of calm. It was a very brief moment before the anxiety slammed into me, but a moment none-the-less.

"Madeline been pestering you?" It was another teasing question but I shook my head.

"I want you to come over more." I didn't wait for his response as I quickly got out of the car, my heart pounding high up in my chest. I tried not to make it look like I was running away as I made my way towards the front door of the main house. I could hear Arlo get out of the car as well and I couldn't help how I tensed slightly, the anxiety within me spiking up once again as it mad my heart pound frantically in my chest.

I pulled open the front door and stepped inside, I could hear Madeline in the living room. Her excitement practically saturated the air and I could hear Ollie chatting to her as I kicked my shoes off. I could feel Arlo step up behind me and I tried so hard not to tense up but the way his eyes trailed over me made my heart race frantically.

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