Escape Route (Decode Sequel)

Chapter Twenty One - Devil's Got A New Disguise.

Harry  

I could even bare to look in the mirror as I passed it in the hall on the way to the bedroom. I had failed. I was a failure. I was everything I said I wouldn’t be. I felt the tears burn down my face again. How could one person get me so messed up? I couldn’t give up, I would never do that. But it had been over a month and we hadn’t so much of gotten a scent, clue or trace. She could be kidnapped and taken all the way to Sicily yet we couldn’t find her now. whoever had her were clever, precise and well trained. 

I pulled on the end of my hair and then pushed it back with my fingers. I hadn’t had a hair cut in weeks, my curls were creeping down my neck. A simple task i couldn’t even bring myself to do. My eyes were red a lot of the time, I had gone further than the point of being ashamed for my tears. My heart felt like it physically ached. When I laid alone at night I wanted to rip it out of its cage inside my body and set it free so I couldn’t feel anymore. I didn’t think I could love someone so much it physically hurt. 

I’d lost weight, not a lot but a somewhat noticeable amount. My clothes fitted looser and my skinny jeans were hardly skinny. I still ate, but keeping it down was harder than imaginable. It was hard to swallow when I didn’t even know if she was being fed at all. 

I’d heard the whispers and the hushed conversations at the main house. No one had given up the search but they were questioning the outcome, if it ever came. I tried not to think about the worst possibilities but it’s all that swarmed my head. Her smile once engraved in my memory had disappeared. All I saw now was the painful expressions of everything situation she had been in because of me. Her beautiful body flashed in my mind covered in bruises, scars and cuts. All because of me. Guilt was eating me alive. I couldn’t concentrate on anything for long. My thoughts never strayed too far away from her. 

I wouldn’t be surprised if wherever she was, she hated me. I promised to protect her numerous times, she must think I’m a liar now. When I get her back, I’ll hold her until our lasts breaths. I’ll never let her go, that’s not a promise, that’s a life commitment. But that’s if she would ever want me back. 

It wasn’t just despair I felt. I was livid. I lost my temper. I shouted, yelled, screeched at anyone but mainly myself. Who in the right mind kidnaps a girl from her own home for their personal needs. She was human, not a bloody toy. I planned what I would do when I got my hands on them - they wouldn’t be walking out the room they walked into. I felt like a ticking time bomb and the seconds were disappearing rapidly.

Liam was right behind me as I walked down the hallway. I didn’t come ‘home’ often because vivid memories of that night shook me up. Liam’s hand rested firmly on my shoulder as we walked through the bedroom door. It wasn't exactly my idea to go back. I’d ran out of clothes to wear, I had no effort to wash any and I’d run out of clothes to steal from the other boys. 

Though Louis wasn’t as highly intellectual as Zayn and Liam, he still tried just as hard to find any source of information. He scanned through computer files, softwares and hard drives of anyone in London he could get his hands on. But nothing remotely concerning a missing nineteen year old girl came up - at all. 

Nothing other than Lennon’s disappearance had interrupted the peace between each London gang in months. We were fully aware it could easily be one of them behind it all. But it was too precise, too well pulled off. Gangs weren’t sloppy, but they were never this neat either. 

“How many t-shirts did you wanna bring?” Liam asked, his head buried deep within my wardrobe and hanging clothes. I paced back and forth in front of the window, barely hearing what he was saying. I didn’t stop walking sluggishly around when I answered, instead I sighed heavily and ran my fingers back through my hair.