Lone [MATURE HS]

Chapter 40

back at it again. something unexpected happened and also, college started, so I've been busy, but this is it. I'm going to start a stricter planning schedule for myself and for my other commitments and responsibilities! <3 thanks for reading. There's a GoFundMe linked on my page! :)

this chapter finally reveals why the book is called "Lone" if anyone wants to take a crack at it lmao

It didn't seem right. I had a feeling that regardless of how supportive the reactions are from both Erin and my mother, and even the law enforcement officials...that something was slightly off. It could be attributed to the pregnancy symptoms, the nausea. But, another gut feeling had certainly voided that possibility.

There were plenty of people in the house at the time. Detectives, police officers, Harry's family lawyers, Harry himself along with Erin, my mother, and myself. After being questioned and essentially lectured by the detective in charge for not going to them initially, I escaped to my bedroom. Nathan was there, slightly curious as to what was happening, but I kept him busy by playing his favorite Harry Potter movie.

Something inside me felt weird. After spilling everything that was eating away at my sanity, my conscience, my being, it felt like...it was too late. Most of my being was gone. I had taken someone's life, and as much as I pushed the idea away, and even began to ignore my own rational brain, I had to define myself as someone chronically...alone.

The only other person that shared the trauma with me was Harry. But even with him there, I began to feel slightly guilty. Only because at the thought of loving him, my love for him was what began this horrifying experience for me. And I hated that I thought that. That I believed that. Nothing, however, could make me blame him. I blame my love for him, instead. I blame myself.

"Tara...are you okay?" Nathan's sweet voice calls for me, my blank stare that was once directly at the wall fades into a weak smile instead when I look over to him.

I nod. "Yeah, I'm fine," I sigh, laying against the headboard of the bed. Nathan was by the foot of the bed, chewing on some carrots and watching the movie on the television stood upon the wooden dresser, remaining satisfied by my answer.

Aimlessly, I gaze at the television, seeing the movie but not watching it. I grow almost numb sitting there, my body performing no physical activities, but my heart kept skipping beats, and it was slightly irregular. For some time, I sit there. Until deciding on taking a bath.

Standing to my feet, I silently exit my bedroom, leaving Nathan to himself. In the hallway, I see Harry. He was already making his way to me. Our eyes meet and neither of us react, seemingly unfazed by everything around us. As long as we were on the same page, as long as we could relate to each other, I felt grounded to this earth, and for that I can't express my gratitude enough. Without him, I'd float, mind and soul, dispersing and fading away.

"Hey."

"Hi." I respond softly, shoving my hands into the pockets of my hoodie. "I'm going to take a hot bath. How's it going...downstairs?"

"The detective in charge was also the one that worked on my dad's case. He um...he thinks a lot of what we said makes a connection to what he's found. Our lawyer says it's likely that the state won't even press charges for Howard...only because a lot of the evidence is already incriminating him and Katherine. They're more than likely to rule self-defense. Our testimonies would be enough," he explains lowly, inhaling deeply. The tired green of his eyes disappears momentarily as he shuts his eyes, reopening them to gaze over at me.

I nod, not even relieved, as the news, whether good or bad, made no difference anymore. The way the worry lines and the lifeless expression of his could be seen for miles, I understood he felt the same way.