Accidental Affection

17 - Flow of Feelings

Draco is awakened suddenly by an unwelcomed familiar sensation of searing knives cutting into his arm. Darkness still pooled into the cave, with the faint hint of sunrise on the far horizon breaking over the waves.

Hermione wakes to the sound of groans and soft shuffling. A shadowy figure appears beside her in the darkness. "Draco," she whispers sitting up and reaching toward him, "it's happening again isn't it?"

No answer other than the whimpers in the dark.

"That foul witch." Hermione cursed.

Sunrise came and gone, the sun now glistening above the waters before the intense pain subsided. Draco sat, head hung low, breathing deeply.

"That was the longest it's lasted," Hermione speaks.

Draco only nods in response, his stomach churning afraid if his mouth opens, he will vomit. "I – I think," Draco breathed finally, "she's toying with me."

"Who?"

"My aunt. I think this is her way to make me suffer until I give in. She's enjoying this I'm sure."

"Draco, I really think we should go see Harry, I'm sure together we could..."

"NO!" Draco spat. "I'm not running to your precious Potter! He'll do nothing for me except throw me in Azkaban! I'll be no safer there than at the Manor right now!"

"No, Harry will be understanding I'm sure of it. He'll want to help."

"I'm not stopping you if you want to go, then go!"

"FINE!" Hermione stood suddenly her foot stomping on the stone floor. "I will go to 'my precious Potter'!"

"GOOD!" Draco sneered. "Don't expect me to come to rescue you when you get in trouble!"

Hermione let out a strained laugh, "the only thing you've done Mr. Malfoy has caused me trouble! Getting away from you will do me some good!" With that, she turned and stormed out of the safety of the cave, wandless and directionless.

Draco watched as Hermione disappeared around the cave walls, his heart sunk deep threatening to choke him as an empty void laid across him like a thick wool blanket in the summer. Pushing his nausea aside Draco stands, rushing out.

"Hermione, please stop."

His pleas fall upon deaf ears as Hermione continues to storm off wandless and oblivious as to where she was or where she was headed, her pace hastened at the sound of his voice.

Draco quickened his pace, coming to a stop in front of her, reaching out he gently grabs her shoulders, looking her in the eyes causing her to pause. "Please."

"Hands off Malfoy! I may not have my wand, but I can slap you another good one!"

Draco lowered his hands, still holding her gaze, she tried to advert her eyes, her head swinging to the left, but he moves his body, causing her to look at him. "Please don't go."

"Why not? You've made it perfectly clear..."

"Remember our first night in the cave, you asked me why I helped you?"

Hermione crossed her arms, "You said you wanted to do what was right. Congratulations. Thank you for helping me. Now may you get out of my way?" She turned on her heel, changing directions.

Draco ran in front of her once again. "I lied." Hermione's eyebrow arched. "Wait, no," he stumbles over his words. "I didn't lie, I do want to do what is right. I want to make things right. But that wasn't the whole truth." Letting out a low growl he spins in a circle his hands disheveling his hair. Why did she seem to have this effect on him? She could drive him wild with just a simple movement. She drove him crazy and he couldn't seem to come to terms if he liked that feeling she gave him, or not. "Why do you do this to me?"

"Excuse me Mr. Malfoy but I can assure you I have not done anything to you. Now if you're done, I'll be on my way."

"I did it because I finally found something that is worse than death!" He blurted out. "Remember when you told me back at the manor that there were some things that are worse than death?" Hermione nodded, Draco continued. "At first I thought you were insane. What could be worse than death? However, that night, when I was ordered to kill you, my dad had sent me away, I realized what I feared more than dying."

"Draco, you're bumbling."

Draco ran a hand through his hair again, a frustrated groan escaped his throat. WHY did she do this to him. He couldn't think straight, talk straight... "I know, I'm sorry." He tilted his head back, peering upward, taking a deep breath, he lowers his head, his steel-grey eyes peering into her big brown ones. "I became addicted to you, Hermione." Searching her eyes, he felt breathless, "I became addicted to your smile, to your laugh, your soul. I realized I couldn't sit back again. I couldn't lose you. If I did," he pauses, adverting his eyes, "if I did, I'm afraid I would die. That's worse than death, losing you."

"To be perfectly honest with you, I have always had feelings for you. Back in Hogwarts even. It just took me all this time to realize it. It was only when I was faced with losing you forever that I was able to admit to myself. That's why I was always badgering you, more than any of the muggles in school. It was because deep down, I knew I would never be good enough for you, although I always told myself it was the opposite and you would never be good enough for me." Draco stopped, letting out a deep huff.

Hermione stood, unsure of what to say.  Her voice finally comes as a small croak, "why didn't you tell me this before?"

"Because I promised myself I wouldn't, you deserve better than me.  You are like an angel you're so special, and me?  I'm a creep, nothing more than a weirdo."  he sighed, "Whatever makes you happy, whatever you want to do I'll give it a try."

"Even go see Harry?"

Draco groaned, "even go see Harry."

"I really do think it would be helpful Draco."

Draco nodded. "Just give me a moment. I'll go grab our things and we can apparate."

Hermione nodded, standing as she watched Draco jog back into the cave. Her head swam with the new information that was thrown at her. Draco, had feelings? And not just any type of feelings, caring ones, for her. The man that spent many years proving to her that he had no feelings for anyone what-so-ever, had feelings for the one who he had tormented since day one.

"Well, well, well." A deep rumbling voice sounds behind her causing her to twist. A large hand gripped her shoulder tightly digging into her flesh.

"LET ME GO!" Hermione swung, her fists swinging idly through the air.

Her pleas are met with a low grumbling chuckle. "Not a chance princess, you are my catch of the day!" He places his other hand around her throat lifting her up from the floor, her eyes meeting the goliath of a man's yellowed toothy snarl.