I f*cked up. Big time.
I have hurt the man I love and now I'm regretting everything.
It's 10 am and I have decided to write a letter to Giovanni. A guy told me he isn't home so this is the only way I could leave my final message.
Before I wrote the message I prayed. I asked God to forgive me for Judging, for hating, for hurting Giovanni and I asked him to make a way where there seems to be no way. I told the Lord that if it isn't meant to be then to give my heart peace.
Samantha is confused to why we are leaving and she keeps asking to say goodbye to Giovanni. She begs to write a goodbye note and leaves it on the nightstand next to mine.
I refuse help from Giovanni's men and walk out the gates estate to wait for an Uber.
"SoSo I'm hungry".
I nod, "Hold on baby I'll get you some food in a minute".
"Why are you crying?"
I touch my face and notice that I am indeed crying.
"My heart is broken".
Samantha wraps her arms around me, "How do we put it back together? With glue?"
I chuckle, "I wish it were that easy honey buns".
***
My apartment is spiky clean. A new lock was installed, the mess was cleaned up, and there is a lot of food in the closet and fridge.
Samantha makes a run to the fridge and comes back with a container of chocolate chip cookies as I slump down on the couch.
"Here SoSo cookies will make you feel better".
I take the cookie not having the heart to tell the child I more want to throw up then eat.
Later I go into my room and call Lace.
"Sophia?"
"I fucked up Lace", I sob into the phone.
"Soph-"
"I fucked up big time and now he hates me".
After an hour of sobbing in the phone to Lace, I begin to feel a tad bit better. I don't tell Lace that Giovanni is in the Mafia but she's a smart girl and I know she figured it out. Lace reminds me that I shouldn't feel like it is completely my fault when he also had his faults by not telling me sooner.
I tell Lace that I love him. I love him whole heatedly. Yes he was the only man I had ever been in a relationship with but I already know he is the one. I love him so much I legitimately don't think I can find anyone else attractive like I see him.
No other man can make me feel the way he made me feel. That will always be true no matter who I meet and how hard I try to force myself to feel like that again.
I told Giovanni everything, about my childhood, family and about myself. The thought of packing up my emotions and starting over with a whole other person makes me jaded.
We haven't officially broken up but if Giovanni tells me he wants out then that's all. I would say to him my piece but then leave.
The last thing I ever want to appear is desperate and there is a fine line between being desperate and fighting for my relationship.
I shake Samantha awake as the Uber comes to a stop.
"Come on darlin let's go visit your dad".
She blinks her eyes a few times then goes running into the hospital.
I let her run into his room where I find them holding each other as she sobs.
Giovanni was right.
"How are you Sophia?"
I smile and walk closer hugging him as beat as I could.
"I'm fine-"
"I may be sick but my vision is just fine. Try again and don't lie to me".
I sigh, "Not so great but we are here to see you so tell me how you feel?"
He sighs as well, "I've seen better days".
"How's everyone doing".
We turn around to see a nurse walking in.
"We're gonna be OK but do you mind taking Samantha down to grab a treat at the vending machine?"
The nurse smiles getting the hint but Samantha holds on tighter to him.
"I don't want one".
"Yes you do Sammy-"
"I wanna stay with you daddy".
"And I'll be right here when you return baby".
"Pinky promise".
"And I'll give you all the lollipops in the world if I don't".
Finally Samantha is convinced and heads out with the nurse.
"What happened my dear".
I sigh, "I messed up Gust. I messed up bad".
"Talk to me".
I tell Gust a sugar coated version of what happened and he helps me understand that it was not all of my fault. He also give me advice and I left the hospital feeling better then I had entered.
Lace comes over a hours later with a glow on her face. I look at her confused then she holds out her hand where a pretty diamond graced her ring finger.
"AAAAHHHH!" I scream as I squeeze her in my arms.
"I know, I know-"
"WHENN?"
"Yesterday night during dinner".
"LAAACEEE IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU SIS!"
she sets down the Ice cream cake that I hadn't seen till now.
"I'm sorry about Giovanni by the way".
I smile and shake my head, "Forget about that, you have to tell me everything!"
We sit on my couch with Sam Cooke playing in the background talking about her engagement and wedding plans.
She says they want to get married as soon as possible because Amir's mother's health was going down.
Her father was obviously excited for his daughter but she wont tell her mother who wont receive an invite anyways.
"We're gonna have like 10 kids and I know 'what about modeling?' Well I'm just gonna be a pregnant model or something".
I smile, "you'd make a beautiful one too".
"Amir wants to get them into Soccer like right away. He hates football though so let's just hope none of our kids are interested".
I laugh, "That would be a mess, your clueless and he's a hater".
She nods, "But I know he would suck it up and maybe maybe even grow to loving it when he watches our child play".
I set my fork down tired of eating cake, "You both will make amazing parents. And I an amazing auntie".
She laughs and I laugh drowning out Sam Cooke's raspy voice as he sings "Nothing can Change this Love".
"CAUSE HONEY NOTHING, NOTHING COULD EVER CHANGE THIS LOVE I HAVE FOR YOUUUU".
Lace stands on the bed jumping up and down, "HOT DIGGIDY DOG SOPHIA I'M GETTING MARRIED!"
I grab a handful of ice cream and slap her face, "HOT DIGGIDY DOG LACE YOUR GONNA BE A WIFE!"
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Hold My Love
रोमांसCOMPLETED✔ "Her skin was the shade of dark chocolate and not the cheap shit, the expensive kind. The kind that your tongue slowly massages as your taste buds dance with amazement from the beauty of it all. The kind you seem to never get enough off c...
