The Class Agreement

22

The weekend came around and honestly, it felt like it was taking forever to.

I was suffocating for the past few days, trying to pretend like Athena and I didn't make out on her couch. I couldn't talk to her about it or bring it up. She just wasn't having it. And I understand, but it's not fair.

I don't have anyone else to talk too about it and it's starting to mess with my moods.

I just needed the weekend to come so that I wouldn't be forced to see her for a bit. The weekend isn't long, but a break is a break. I'm starting to think that maybe being switched out of her class won't be so bad after all.

If I don't see her maybe it'll be easier for all of this to pass. I can go back to being alone with no attachment to anyone.

Except for Tommy, I guess.

My plan for the weekend wasn't to stay home though. Fuck that.

I put on a nice black shirt and jeans. I let my hair loose and made sure my wallet had my I.D. and enough cash. I sprayed my favorite cologne on me and checked myself out in the bathroom mirror before leaving.

Tonight I'm going with Jasmine to a gay club even further out of town. Jasmine says this club is nicer and she gets away with drinks there too since she knows all the bartenders. It's one of her favorite clubs.

It's good that we're getting away for the weekend. I don't feel like possibly running into people I know or usuals at Gamma. I want to get away and this is the best it'll get until I graduate.

I got into Jasmine's car and buckled up.

She eyed me and smirked, "Woah, someone looks killer tonight,"

I shrugged, "I just wanna have fun. That's all."

She pulled off into the night, my house getting further and further away, "Hm ... what cat got your tongue now?"

I quickly denied her question, "What? No one. Told you that's not on my plate right now."

"You sure? You seem ... down."

"I mean my mother is dead. My Dad won't really open up to me and is almost never home. Don't really blame him. This is my second year being a senior. Not a lot of things to be happy about I guess."

She stood quiet. I know Jasmine isn't going to pry any further than that.

Besides leaving out Athena, it's all true. Some days are harder than others. On those days, I feel everything on my shoulders. Pushing me into the concrete and trying to trap me there. It's hard to ignore and in therapy, I learned that ignoring things harm you more than they help you.

Ignoring things is easier though.

"Well, hopefully, you can find someone hot tonight. You need a nice one night stand to clear your head," She said.

"Maybe," I responded.

Is that really what I want? To hook up? I mean it would make the weekend a little more enjoyable.

And what do I have to lose? I'm single. Free to do whatever I want. I don't have to worry about anyone, but myself. Maybe tonight will be the night someone takes me home. Someone who feels the same way I do.

Someone who just wants a break.

I decided to switch the spotlight off of me and ask Jasmine how she's been.

"What about you?" I asked.

She sucked her teeth, "Ah, nothin'. Just working and hanging out with Cam and Chai most days. We miss you, you know."