Almost Home

Chapter Seventeen

A knock on the door wakes me from my slumber and I open it to find Tom pacing back and forth, glancing at his watch in irritation. 'You took your time,' he looks at me and scoffs when he takes in my appearance. I hastily reach up to flatten my hair and wince in pain at the sudden movement.

'What's the matter with you?' Tom questions me.

'I hurt! Everywhere! Every part of me aches!' I reply dramatically, hugging my arms around my sore body.

'For God's sake, Em, it's always the same with you. Just take it easy today...I wanted to let you know I'm going to pick up Chloe from the airport so I'll be gone for a few hours.'

'I forgot she was coming today,' I reply and my misery is quickly replaced with excitement, liking the fact that I'd have another girl around the chalet to cancel out so much testosterone.

'How are you feeling though? You know, with everything.'

I smile discreetly, knowing how much Tom hated the emotional stuff. He'd clearly been coerced into asking me by mum and I knew that whatever I say was going to be sent straight back for an update.

I pause before I answer.

How do I feel?

I was definitely not as sad as I used to be, or as lost and that alone was enough of an accomplishment. That feeling of hopelessness I've been carrying around has been a part of my life for so long now that it was ingrained within me, coursing through my veins. Not just since I found out about Nathan's infidelity. It was way before then. Being in love with someone who doesn't care about you, doesn't love you back is soul-destroying. You end up questioning your worth. But not anymore.

Being here with Tom and Jamie, laughing until the muscles in my stomach physically hurt has been the only antidote I needed after nearly a decade of dealing with crap. I feel lighter already. I'm learning to love myself again, to not judge myself on how others perceive me. I don't feel like I'm just someone's girlfriend anymore, ready and willing to make someone else happy. Now I'm happy and for once I don't have to lie about it.

'I'm actually really good,' I say with conviction and Tom gives me a playful dig in the arm, his way of showing me he was glad. 'I love it here, it's a good distraction. And I love being back with you and Jay, it's just like the old times again.'

'Well, you look better. In general I mean, not right now. Right now you look a mess!' He skims his eyes over my sleep attire, an outfit that consisted of an oversized pink t-shirt that was several sizes too big for me and my Winnie the Pooh pyjama bottoms and I have to say he was probably right. 'I'm just glad I've managed to get you away from that git! You know I didn't like him from the moment I met him?'

'Tom I think the entire world knew you hated him. If you think you were being discreet about your feelings you really need to get yourself checked out.'

'It wasn't just me. Not that mum would ever have a bad word to say about anything to do with you or the vermin you choose to date but I could tell even if she wouldn't admit it to me. And I know Jamie wasn't keen on him either!'

'Oh, really?' I lean against the door frame in what I hope was a casual manner, not wanting Tom to know that what he'd just said about his best friend had sent my heart soaring, especially after our more than telling conversation in my bedroom last night in which I'm pretty sure Jay was coming on to me. Damn Steph and her blatant interfering. Last night could have been the night, the one where we admit that we've been madly in love with each other forever and there's no way we could suppress it any longer but she couldn't keep her big nose out and ruined it!