Almost Home

Chapter Twenty-Six

I couldn't have asked for a better day with Jamie. Being away from prying eyes meant we could just relax and have fun with no one lording over us, watching our every move. It's not like I don't enjoy spending time with Tom because I really do, he's my big brother and even though I would never admit it to him, I've missed having him around, especially the last few months. Growing up, we would fight like cats and dogs but I always knew Tom was someone I could tell anything to and wouldn't get judged, even when I admitted to sneaking answers into a test in school. The guilt had eaten me up for weeks and when he finally wrestled my secret out of me, instead of getting angry and telling mum, he just laughed and said it was part of the Austin genes and slapped me on the back with pride.

So the fact that Jamie and I had snuck out before Tom woke this morning tells me that we knew what we were doing was wrong. Not in the sense that we shouldn't be spending time alone together, because we've been alone thousands of times before; when Tom would refuse to join in our silly games growing up, when he would ditch us for dates as we all got older, it didn't matter. But that was then...when there were no feelings involved.

Feelings...I'm pretty sure that's what it is between us. Well I know it is on my part but after the last few days, especially today, I think it's what it might be for Jamie too. I think he might actually find me attractive and that sends my head spinning into overdrive. I hate that I'm going behind Tom's back and sneaking around with his best friend instead of being honest with him but deep down I know that Tom wouldn't be okay with it and it hurts to admit it. I'm scared he'll force Jamie and I to end things before we can even see what this 'thing' between us is. Not to spoil my chance of happiness, but because he's protective of me. A bit TOO protective at times but he's just trying to look out for me.

I mean...I'm sure he'd get over it...eventually.

Fresh droplets of snow land on my face and I forget about my afflicted thoughts momentarily, noticing for the first time how dark it had gotten in the last hour. The midday sun had disappeared behind thick grey clouds that threatened the sky above us and I signal a time out to Jamie as I steer my board towards the safety of trees halfway down the slope, a place that had been my sanctity as I hid from the perils of other skiers and boarders yesterday.

'I need a rest, I'm exhausted,' I gasp and whip my goggles off as Jamie comes and plonks himself down beside me. Just in time too as we narrowly avoid a group of skiers as they come pelting past us, all moving in perfect unison.

I can't help but marvel at how graceful they seemed to be, the long line of them swishing through the snow as if dancing. Maybe I should try skiing next time? But I shake the thought out of my head almost as quickly as it entered it. I've just got to grips with one board beneath my feet, I don't think I'm quite ready for two, especially when they can go in different directions on their own accord. 'I still can't believe I'm here,' I say, more to myself than to Jay. So much has changed in just ten days that I have to pinch myself that this is all real.

'I'm glad you decided to come.' I find myself beaming at Jamie's words and when I look at him he's playing with his goggles, turning them over and over in his hands. He's so bloody adorable.

'Me too. I'm going to remember this day for the rest of my life.'

His face breaks into a wide smile and I catch him wince slightly as he reaches up to place a tentative finger on his lip, testing the cut to make sure it wasn't reopening.

'You okay there, rocky?'

'Rocky?!' He looks falsely affronted and when I do an impression of him punching Finn he closes his eyes in despair. 'I really embarrassed myself there, didn't I?'

'You did not! Though you are starting to get a name for yourself! Punching drunk Irishmen... Throwing school bullies in bins... Anything else I should know about?'