Almost Home

Chapter Thirty-One

'Can you grab me some bread sweetheart?' I snap out of my melancholy to find mum staring at me further up the aisle, checking a carton of eggs to make sure none were broken, my plan of moping in bed for the rest of the day scuppered when she'd asked me to drive her to the supermarket. She'd claimed her contact lenses were irritating her but I know fully well she was just trying to get me out of the house and now I was trudging along behind her, unenthusiastically.

It was 6:20 pm. That meant Jamie's plane would be taking off at any moment and I couldn't shake the devastating feeling that I hadn't done enough to make him stay. I'm not saying I was going to do some cheesy movie cliche and chase him through the airport, declaring my love for him in front of hundreds of complete strangers but I just watched silently as he drove away and now he's left thinking I don't care, when I do. I care.

I realise mum is still looking at me and I feel guilty that I've been neglecting her since I've come home, consumed in my doleful thoughts. 'Sorry, what did you say?'

'Bread... Do you mind grabbing me a loaf?' She looks at me thoughtfully as I pick one up off the shelf and toss it into the trolley without conviction. 'Are you okay Emma, you seem distracted today?'

'I'm fine. I'm sorry...I think I'm still a little tired from all that travelling yesterday. It took it out of me a bit.'

'I can imagine! Well, you're home now so I can look after you. How about I cook you a nice pasta bake tonight?'

'Yeah, that'll be lovely. Thank you.'

She hands me the eggs to put in the trolley and looks back to examine her shopping list, calling over her shoulder as she disappears around the corner, 'You didn't get the loaf with seeds in, did you? They get stuck in my teeth.'

'It's not the seeded one mum,' I smile after her as we make our way to the next aisle.

I wonder if Jamie will think to message me when he gets to America, or would he be too busy... Maybe if I've not heard from him by the weekend I'll send him a quick text, just to make sure he's landed okay.

'Oh, no!' Mum halts suddenly and I have to act fast so I didn't crash into the back of her.

'What's wrong?!' She looks anxious as she grabs the front of the trolley and attempts to turn us back around. 'Mum, you're freaking me out! What's happened?'

'Well, hello there Trudy.....Emma.'

Turning in the direction of the voice, I try to swallow but what felt awfully like a lump of coal had formed in my throat. Stood before us, arm in arm with a pretty redhead was none other than Nathan, and by the look on his smarmy face he couldn't have been happier to 'bump into us.'

Bump into, my arse. He knows that Thursday was mums only day off work and the day we did our food shop.

'Fancy seeing you two here!'

'Yeah...fancy that!'

Mum has refused to acknowledge him, she's peering over her shoulder, frantically searching for the exit and I try to convey to her not to worry.

Looking at him now I can't see anything of the boy I first fell in love with. Gone was the friendly smile and shining green eyes that used to make me weak at the knees. Now all I see is an antagonistic sneer and vengeful coldness staring back at me. He's gone out of his way to try and upset me today but standing here now, I realise that can't happen anymore. Because I don't care. I don't care if he's seeing someone new. I don't care if he drops down to his knees right this second and proposes in front of me. How could I care when all I feel when I look at him is pity? Pity that even after everything he has done to me, he was still unable to move on with his life.