eighteen

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tw- mention of self harm

"I have to find kai" I say to billie as we run down the back street away from the party.

it's chaos.

theres people half naked running down the street, people with no shoes on, people still with bottles of her hand.

"kai knows how to look after themselves" she's grabbing tightly onto my hand and she's pulling me away and I have no idea where im going.

"this has happened before and they've got tons of friends, don't worry"

I feel like im gonna be sick

I want to stop running but I don't wanna slow down.

my grandma will kill me if I ever got caught.

billie pulls me down a little path beside a house and we run down the dark alley and im holding onto billies hand for dear life.

we start to slow down and I look around to see no-one around us, the smoke far away.

my phone pings and I see it's kai.

kai: dude where are you?

sage:escaping with billie
sage: are you safe?

kai: yeah i'm safe, im okay
kai:was worried about you

sage: i'm fine
sage: I think im gonna go home, sorry

kai: it's okay, text me when you get home

sage: will do

"can you take me home?" she nods and walks towards a matte black dodge challenger, fishing for a key in her pocket.

billie opens the passenger door and I slip inside, watching her jog into the drivers side and, turning on the engine.

silently I buckle my belt and jump when the music comes blasting out the speakers. "sorry" billie mumbles, switching it off when she notices me flinch.

billie pulls away and zooms down the street and I blow out a breath.

fuck.

"are you okay?" billie asks, glancing over to me.

"I don't know" I admit.

"do you wanna talk about what happened earlier?"

"no"

"im sorry about z"

why is she apologising for them?

"no offence billie but why are you friends with them?"

"we grew up dancing together. she was my best friend. they have a hard life at home and lived with me for a while and then, they fell into the wrong crowd and was no longer welcome at my house"

makes sense.

"they've been through alot and I don't wanna just drop them. she can be a good person when she wants to be"

I don't think ive ever met them sober but I feel like billie is a good judge of character.

I don't like how dangerous z acted tonight, it's not safe.

"im sorry you had to see them like that. ill find her in the morning when they're sobered up or else we'll fight"

I don't know what to say to that.

I can't imagine having a best friend like that.

it's messed up.

"it smells like you in here" I say, slowly running my finger along the soft leather of the seat.

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