10. Lithium

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Song: letdown by nothing, nowhere.

A/N: To help the story along, I will be doing things from other character's perspectives now. Noah and Iris are stuck in a tiny room, and there isn't much I can do with them at the moment! lol Thank you for reading! xx

*Kade's Point of View*


"No, Jess," I snap, rolling off of her body. "I've already told you that it's not happening."

Her cold hands begin to slide down my bare torso as she lays in bed beside me naked, yet my mind still flashes back to Iris, and how her hands were always so warm and soft. Every touch she presented me with was soft and loving. My heart clenches, and I let out a shaky breath.

Jessica's sharp voice breaks me away from my thoughts. "But, Kaaade, we are having a baby together. Don't you want to be a family?"

'Yea, but not with you,' I think to myself. "I need to get ready for work," I tell her in a flat voice.

She lets out an angry huff as I hop up from the bed and walk to the bathroom. I lock the door behind me, paying her no mind. She is useless to me.

I slip my clothes on and walk over to the sink, feeling nothing more than numb and hollow. My reflection stares back at me, washed out and faded. With a shaky hand, I reach up and open the cabinet, pulling my orange prescription bottle down to me. Inside lay little pills.

My eyes fixate on them as I feel my stomach begin to churn. I'm so fucked up that I need meds to be normal. My mind is so broken that I can't function without the help of pills. Iris knew that, and she still loved me. She still tried to take care of me, and what did I do? I pissed on it. What kind of fucking monster am I? The medicine makes me feel like a zombie, most of the time, but why couldn't I just hold on for her? Why couldn't I just take them for her? Out of all the people in the world, why couldn't I do it for her? I don't deserve her love. I don't deserve to live.

"Iris," I murmur. It comes out as a strangled whisper. "I miss you, Angel." My hands begin to tremble even harder as I unscrew the cap off the bottle, picturing her beautiful face in my mind with her little baby bump, holding our daughter inside- The daughter that will never be able to meet me. A roaring hurricane of emotions rip through my body as I begin to sob, and one by one I swallow all twenty-four of the remaining pills and then pick my phone up off of the counter. My fingers move quickly as I text the only woman that has ever calmed this damn storm inside of me.

*Kade: I took my meds for you, Baby. I love you. Tell Emma that Daddy loved her, too.

I wait for a minute until I finally come to terms with the fact that she isn't going to text back. She will never speak to me again. Just as I am about to turn my phone off for the final time, it begins to buzz. I look at the screen, hopeful, but I am disappointed to see that it is just Damian. With a shaky breath, I answer.

"Hello?"

"Kade," Damian says, speaking quickly. "We went to Iris's dad's, but it wasn't her dad at the house. It was Iris's mom. She told us that her dad died. We spent the day visiting with her, and when I left, Noah and Iris stayed, but Iris texted me, telling me that she got a bad vibe from her. I told her I'd come get her early today, but when I got there, the door was wide open, and they were all three gone. I don't know what happened, but I have a really bad feeling. I can't get ahold of Sage and Cole. Will you let them know? I'm staying here to look for them."

I stand there, not knowing how to respond. Iris is missing? "Find Iris's old friend, Lindsey Connell. Iris told me that they lived on the same street. Maybe she knows something about that. I'll try to get in touch with Cole."

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