Simply Submissive (Secretly Submissive Sequel) (Finished)

14. Issues

Song: Awful Things by Lil Peep

At some point during the drive back, my sobs turn into silent tears, and then, several hours later, I wake, still curled up in Lindsey's lap. She notices me stir, and her hand goes back to brushing through my hair. "Hey," she says, speaking softly.

I don't respond for a moment. Visions of Kade flash in the back of my mind, flickering like an old picture film. I think of nights that we laughed together, cuddling in bed, with our naked bodies intertwined, fitting the other's perfectly. I think of mornings, when we would go out to eat together, and days that we would waste away at home, watching TV and just being together. I think of days that I would go to therapy appointments with him for his mental health. Those were days when we still had hope. Why can't we go back to those days? Why can't I just remember what hope feels like?

"Hey," I whisper, responding to her, emotionless.

"We are here," Damian says, slowing as he pulls into a parking space.

The car comes to a halt, and then Noah glances back to me. "Can we talk before you go in?"

I slowly rise and glance back to him. "Sure," I say in an almost inaudible voice.

"Damian and I will go ahead and go in," Lindsey says, looking over to Damian, hinting for him to follow her as she opens her door.

They both get out and the car falls silent, until Noah speaks. "I just wanted to say before we go in that I love you."

I feel my chest tighten. "I cant do this right now, Noah. I'm sor-"

"Wait," he says, cutting me off. "That wasn't all I was going to say." He takes a deep breath before continuing. "Iris, I love you, and that's why I want to let you know that whatever happens in this hospital between you and Kade stays between the two of you. I won't ask about it. I won't pry. You told your dad that I was your boyfriend. That was really nice to hear, but the situation is different now. I understand that. I'm sure you are a mess inside. Just take your time, and like I have told you before, I will always be here waiting for you."

Tears have already started to fill my eyes. "Thank you, Noah," I whisper. "I don't know how things are going to change when we walk through those doors, but before they do." A shaky breath leaves my lips. "I'm not in love with you. I haven't given myself enough time to be, yet. There is a part of me that really loves you though. There is a part of me that loves you and never wants to lose you."

Noah turns away just before a tear can escape his crystal blue eyes. "You'll never lose me, Iris. I'm yours. I have been since the first day we met."

Without another word, I slide out of the car and rush into the hospital. I can't stand to be around Noah for another second right now. When I enter the waiting room, I walk straight to the front desk just after nodding at Damian, Lindsey, and Cole sitting in chairs over in the corner.

"Hello, I'm here to visit Kade Sommers," I say to the older lady behind the window of the desk.

"OK, give me just a moment," she says, checking something on her desktop. She glances back to me. "Are you of any relation to Mr. Sommers?" She asks, glancing back to me.

I nod. "We are engaged," I say, lying. "I'm pregnant with his baby."

I see her eyes soften, and she gives me a sympathetic look. "He's in room 403, on the third floor."

"Thank you," I reply, flatly. I feel so hollow.

I enter the elevator and press the button floor. Just before the doors slide shut, I gaze out to the lobby right as Noah enters. I feel my heart stop as he gives me an encouraging smile, but even from this distance, I can see the pain in his eyes. This is too much for me to take.