17. Braxton Hicks

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Song: Note Even Her (ft. Shiloh)


"Iris, are you even listening?" Lindsey asks.

Her voice snaps me out of my trance. "Huh? Yea, about the thing with Damian." I try to play along.

She scoffs. "Yea, Dork. What thing?"

I try to think for a moment, and then give her a sheepish smile. "I-I don't know. I was zoned out."

I hear her laugh from the other side of the sofa. I'm still curled up under the blankets. It's where I slept last night. "I was talking about this date we had last night. It was amazing. What has been on your mind?"

I shrug, letting my eyes fall. "Just not completely awake yet, I guess," I mumble.

"Don't give me that bull. Tell me," she says, firmly. "Maybe it will help to talk about it. I know that since Kade woke up yesterday, you have way too much in that head of yours."

My gaze flickers back up to her, and a small smile crosses my face. I've missed her. No matter what I am going through, it feels good to know that I have Sage and Lindsey to talk to. "I just-" I hesitate for a moment, thinking of how to put all of my jumbled thoughts into words. "I'm really stressing about today. Last night, Noah and I talked about being together. I know that Kade and I are having this baby together, but I don't think I can ever trust him after everything that-" I feel a lump begin to form in my throat, and my next words are strangled. "After everything that he has done to us, I just-"

I stop to take a deep, shaky, breath, and Lindsey jumps in to help me. "Iris, do you think any of us really expect you to run back to Kade just because you're pregnant? This is the twenty-first freaking century! You are a beautiful and independent woman, who is allowed to make her own choices based off of her own emotions."

"I know," I reply, frantically wiping the tears away that have escaped my eyes. "But I am also an expecting first time mother, whose life has been falling apart faster that she could ever hope to try and put it back together. The reason I've been so spaced out since I woke up is because I know that after last night with Noah, I'm going to have to go set some things straight with Kade. He needs to know what is going on."

She stares at me with sympathetic eyes. "Are you sure you're ready to talk about it with him?"

I let out a soft, bitter laugh. "If I waited until I were ready, Emma would be a full grown woman, probably."

"Better go get ready then," Lindsey says, rubbing my leg. "Do I need to go with you?"

I shake my head. "No, Noah is going to give me a ride, and he will wait out in the lobby while I talk to Kade."

Lindsey leans over, wrapping her arms around me, tightly. "Alright, well good luck. It'll all be OK."

I hug her back, squeezing her. "I really hope so, Linds."

Lindsey rushes off to the kitchen when she sees Damian, following him like a love sick puppy, and I can't help but to smile. Pushing aside everything that has happened in my life, I couldn't be happier to have her back in my life, and it's so great to see Damian actually be excited to be with someone. He really has feelings for her. I would have never paired the two together in my mind, but seeing them together in person is just perfect.

Without further hesitation, I make my way up the stairs. As I pass Noah's room, I glance in and see him sprawled out, still fast asleep. I resist the urge to open the door all the way and crawl into bed with him, though the blankets pushed away from his bare torso make it very hard. I need to remind myself to take it slow. Diving in too fast with a man that I didn't take the time to really get to know got me into this mess, and I can say with certainty that it's not going to get me out of it.

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