Do You Believe In Aliens? [Kylo Ren x Reader]

22- What are we?

You didn't sit next to Kylo after that. Instead, you found yourself a spot near the back of the ship, probably reserved for any stormtroopers travelling with him. But it was empty, and it was away from Kylo. You sat down on one of the long benches and put your face in your hands. How stupid could you be, really? Believing that he really cared for you, that he was really a good person. He was dangerous, and selfish, and he was ruthless.

You tried not to cry, but your throat was burning with the need to. If you cried now, Kylo would know from your red puffy eyes and he'd want to know why. Perhaps he already knew, but he hadn't said anything. It was better that way, him being silent. If he tried to explain himself, you didn't want to hear it. There was no justifying his slaughtering of innocents, but you supposed that if he was willing to do that- then he felt no need to justify it. Kylo Ren killed because he felt like it, because he believed he was powerful enough to do so without question.

Well, he didn't control you, and you weren't going to listen to him anymore. He had betrayed your trust, your love. You wiped away the few tears that had slipped down, and tried to keep your face stoic as you waited out the journey. Once you were back on the ship, you would ask to be taken home. How foolish you were, to believe your home was with Kylo- that beast. No, your home was on Earth, and you were going home soon.

~~~~~~~~

General Hux only frowned when you asked him. 

"Really? You want to go back all because a few Resistance scum lost their lives?"

You nodded, "They were unarmed! They weren't hurting us!"

"Even if that's so, the Resistance aren't peaceful by any means, if they had been allowed to live, they only would have launched a counter attack. Better them gone now, then returning later." He turned away from you to survey the sky. You were on the bridge, but for once you weren't looking to be an annoyance. You joined Hux in watching, trying to spot the far off planets, picking them out from among the stars. 

Hux looked down at you, "You really wish to return? To leave this place for your Earth? Tell me, what does Earth have that's so special to you?"

"My friends, my family. I have a life back there. There's nothing for me on this ship."

"Ah, pitiful sentiment. You have work on the Finalizer, no? And you were just taken to Canto Bight. The galaxy has much more to offer."

"Forgive me, General, but I don't want to work under Kylo Ren."

Hux had to hold back his laughter. His voice dropped to a whisper, "Believe me, Y/N, not a lot of people do."

"Then why?" You asked,

"Because by complying, we're given opportunities, things we couldn't have if we tried to rebel. The Resistance don't see it, but compliance is best for everyone."

You looked out at space again. It felt like an age ago, sitting in your bedroom, dreaming of this very picture. You had longed to be amongst the stars and the planets, floating effortlessly through the beauty of the universe. Now you were here, you wondered if you had been right to dream. It had only led to this, this pain as you realised that your dream had not come true at all. You may be in space, but you were still hurt, still heartbroken and sad. What good was all this beauty, if you weren't happy enough to enjoy it?

Hux slicked back his hair, "Now, if there's nothing else, you best get back to your quarters."

You nodded, leaving without another word. Deep down, you knew your conversation hadn't changed anything. Unless there was compassion somewhere on this ship, its course would not change. You doubted that you would ever return to Earth, but you still couldn't accept a life under Ren. Even as you stepped into the luscious quarters he had gifted you, you couldn't feel anything asides from anger towards him. You sat down on the sofa and tried to block out the world.