Chapter 19

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I'm currently sitting right outside of a cafe with my girls with my email inbox opened up on my laptop.

"Just open the emails bro, I'm sure UCLA has something good to say."

I see two different emails from them. One from the admissions office and the other from UCLA athletics.

"I'm really nervous." Chanel rolls her eyes and Elisa claps her hands together, "Girl stop you're literally a smart cookie and a phenomenal athlete."

I take a deep breath and open the first email. I gasp at the email that is front of me and then squeal.

"I GOT IN." I exclaim.

Some people turn to look at me so then I give an apologetic look, "Sorry."

"See what did we say. Now check the other one." Chanel says as she is pointing to the laptop.

I open the next one and immediately freeze after reading the first line of the email.

Tears begin to well up in my eyes and Chanel holds my hand.

"They don't want me." I then start to sob.

"I... I.. worked so hard. I just can't believe it.."

The coach seemed so interested but I should have gotten the hint... I haven't heard from him since the homecoming game.

"You know what screw them." Elisa says and Chanel agrees with her.

"Yeah they could've had a bad*** quarterback but they fumbled. It's their loss."

I sniffle, "Their loss? They're fricking UCLA. The only person losing here is me."

Chanel grabs the laptop from me. She is scrolling through something.. probably my email.

"Girl... you literally have two other schools who are interested in meeting with you. They also accepted you into their school too."

Elisa looks over the screen and her eyes widen, "Dude yeah USC and UMich."

She begins scrolling through my laptop too, "You got into all your back up schools. But those two school's seem to be interested in giving you a football related offer. Or whatever."

I dry my tears and take a sip from my coffee, "I mean those two schools are good too I guess."

"Good? More like amazing, you should be proud. Everything happens for a reason. Plus you did get into UCLA, if you just want to be a student you-." I cut Elisa off.

"No... football means everything to me. I need to be playing." She nods, "Got it."

I just don't know what school I would commit to.

And I'm going to have to make a decision soon..

***
After I left the cafe, I felt as if I wasn't ready to go back home.

I have two offers from great schools but I just can't help but feel extremely down.

Like huh let me reintroduce myself. I'm Zara....

The girl who couldn't even keep a man.

The girl who will never be as successful as her siblings or her parents.

Tears begin to fall down my cheeks.

All that hard work and for what?

I feel like I just wasted my time.

And like how am I supposed to choose from those two schools?

One is all the way in Michigan.

It takes a day if you travel there by road and a flight is 4 hours long.

All my friends and family are here in California and I love this place more than anything.

What would I even tell my parents?

"Hey I'm moving to Michigan see ya!"

That then leaves me with USC but I never pictured myself playing with them.

I seriously can't even imagine myself playing for that team.

And I just know every time I step onto the field I'll just think of how I should be playing for UCLA, and how I'm on the wrong field.

I hear my phone chime.

I look down to see a message from "the players" group chat.

The players group chat is basically everyone who's on the football team.

We have another group chat with the people I'm closer with but that one doesn't even have a name, it's just a bunch of ugly emojis.

I click on the message.

Haris: Guess what?

Moe: Chicken butt

Austin: Your mom?

*Haris dislikes his message*

Chanel: What?

Haris: I GOT AN OFFER FROM UCLA

My heart stops.

I feel it drop to the earth's core.

You're kidding?

YOU HAVE TO BE JOKING.

HE LITERALLY IS A BACK UP HOW THE HECK? That doesn't even make sense. He literally would not even be on this team if Drey didn't get injured.

I'm literally so upset right now.

I begin to hysterically cry and then I look to see another message.

But this time it was a private message.

Chanel: Did you see the group chat?

She's my best friend for a reason.

She definitely knows that I'm upset right now.

I message her back.

Me: It's just not fair bro.

Now I really know why people say it's a man's world.

I have been playing since I was a kid. I've been eating disgustingly large amounts of protein since I was young.

I can bench more than most dudes and I'm literally a phenomenal quarterback.

Why was that not enough?

Is it because I'm not tall enough?

Is it because I'm not a man?

Why does that even matter what more do I need to do to prove myself?

I won't even lie this just made myself feel so discouraged and I just know no one is going to even understand.

And if I start slacking now, I'm not going to even have the offers that I have now.

I wipe my tears and look down at the pond in front of me.

I observe the girl that is looking back at me and..

At this moment I feel the switch inside of me flip.

This happened because you were not doing enough.

This is your fault.

But I can't do anything about what has been done.

However I'm going to make sure UCLA regrets letting me down like this.

I'm going to be an international star.

Just you guys wait.

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End of chapter! Share this story guys, I promise I'm going to finish this story soon. It's starting to drag out and I wanna write other stories.

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