emotions | love alarm

36 ~

Chapter Thirty-Six

It had taken her all of about two hours to figure out what she would do about what In-ho had just done. She had flipped the moments that occurred between the non-consensual kiss and In-ho leaving for minutes on end and had revisited the instant she felt her skin crawl with uneasiness and almost dysmorphia. She replayed the feeling of his mouth on hers, how his touch was gentle, kind, and how he had exhaled in relief upon meeting her lips. 

She had analyzed it all.

And she had concluded that she would not tell Sun-oh because she didn't want him to assume that she had caused it. 

Was it a silly train of thought? Perhaps. But she couldn't risk it; she didn't want him to misinterpret or misunderstand or even mishear—to avoid it all would be to act in silence so that is what she would do. 

Her phone pings sharply as she presses her palms into her hands and sighs. 

Sun-oh: This reminded me of you. *picture of a stuffed narwhal*

She lets out a sharp laugh before tears prick her eyes and this time when the tears come she lets them. 

***

Sun-oh looks over at Ae-ri as the teacher starts explaining some elaborate theorem in math and finds her deep in thought, brows furrowed, fingers twirling a pen. He spares a glance at In-ho who was still seated next to her only to find him with a look of raw exasperation and slight frustration in his eyes; his fidgeting was relentless and that was more than a bit concerning. 

Something had happened between them and yet Sun-oh had not received any information about the ordeal—no indication that something was amiss. He was usually kept in the loop, especially after everything that had gone down before the banquet, but this time Ae-ri hadn't vocalized anything. 

By the time lunch rolls around his curiosity is peaking too high for him not to ask, "What's going on between you and In-ho? I thought you guys agreed on friendship."

"Hm?" she pulls herself from within the recesses of her mind and he shakes his head, confused.

"Ae-ri, are you okay?"

She eases into a smile and releases the tension in her shoulders, "Very much so." Her eyes meet his and by the small glint in them, he realizes the tiny jab at their current situation. 

They were more than friends; not officially, nothing had been confirmed but...

...they were more. 

His cheeks flush a bit and he returns her smile. "I'm glad I can be of service," he says quietly, his eyes flittering across her face. 

By the time they get their lunch and sit down, they are bantering in a way that fills Sun-oh with a certain flavor of pleasant nostalgia and warm joy that makes his heart swell. He had missed speaking to her like this, being with her in public without fear of rumors, seeing her smile and knowing he was the reason. 

He had missed all of it. 

"Darling, I would never doubt you but this feels far-fetched."

"What do you mean far-fetched? It's already been accomplished we just need to up the technology and figure out more."

"I wouldn't put it past you."

"But at the same time, I think it's more silly wishful thinking that we allow ourselves to believe we can discover the secrets of the universe as measly humans."

"Agreed."

Ae-ri shakes her head, a smile playing on her lips, "But you wouldn't put it past me?"

Sun-oh places his chopsticks down and cups Ae-ri's jaw, his thumbs caressing the tops of her cheeks, "Sweetheart, you can do anything you set your mind to and I will always be supporting you. No matter what."

Ae-ri feels her body warm at the sincerity behind his words just as a small nagging edge of guilt slips its way through the cage she locked it in inside her brain. She exhales softly, meeting Sun-oh's brown eyes that were full of adoration, love, and something more. 

She presses a kiss to his thumb and smiles at him, leaning into his right hand with a teasing look in her eyes, "Even if I decided to rob a bank?"

"Ae-ri."

***

It was the end of the day and In-ho was more than ready to go home and drown himself in homework so aggressively that he would have nothing else to think about. 

The day had been long and painful and sitting that close to Ae-ri knowing that she more likely than not hated him had been the worst torture he could think of. She hadn't even spared a glance at him and by the way she acted, he could tell she had no interest in whatever he had to offer up as an apology. 

He had crossed a boundary that should never have been crossed and now he wished he was capable of feeling remorse for his actions but alas—he didn't. The single moment was more than enough for a lifetime of being close but not close enough. He would be okay. He could die knowing what her mouth tasted like and that was more than sufficient. 

His phone buzzes in his hand and his mom's contact information pops up. He sighs before looking around and answering. 

"Mother?"

"Did you speak to her today?"

"She's kinda angry and I don't blame her."

"But the plan, In-ho," his mother scolds him gently. 

"The plan was messy to begin with, mom. I don't know why you thought it would work."

"It is working, we just need a bit more time. Amara is working out a few more kinks. Promoting this friendship was ideal, it was necessary–"

He closes his eyes tightly and sighs in resignation, "–Mom, you made me play pretend with Ae-ri for what? There was no point to this entire ordeal. She doesn't even like me."

His mother sighs and In-ho hears something fall on the floor nearby but as he goes to look his mom says, "You did the best you could. Keep trying? For me?"

"Sure."

***

Sun-oh panics and silently swears as his phone slaps on the floor and turns around to make sure In-ho wasn't onto him. He hears soft rustling then stillness and a, "Sure." 

He sighs in relief and does a silent jog to the boy's bathroom. He needed a minute to digest what he had just heard and a more secluded area did not currently exist. He catches his breath as he slips into a stall and leans his hands against the door, his head dropping past his shoulders. He looks at the floor before blinking in confusion and awe. 

That manipulative little shit. 

The thoughts piece themselves together slowly. 

In-ho's mom, Yu-jun, behind everything.

In-ho using Ae-ri so his family could seek favor in the business deal. 

No. It couldn't be. In-ho wouldn't stoop that low. 

He shakes his head, wanting to the facts to shift to different positions, for a different conclusion to manifest itself, but nothing else made logical sense. He runs a hand through his hair and goes to shoot a text to Ae-ri; if anyone could make sense of it all, it was her. 

He hesitates. 

But what if she thinks I'm lying?

No, she wouldn't. She would believe you. 

He pauses. For the first time since he met Ae-ri, he did not know that she would believe him and the uncertainty was setting him into a panic. 

No, no. She would believe me...Right?

He sighs and types out the message, sending it immediately. 

She has to.