you can't help but become the sun / julien baker

chapter forty-five

Maggie's Pov:
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"Hm," I stirred around, trying to hold onto my slumber. It was rather hard, maybe because kisses were being pressed all over my face and neck. My eyes shot open once I realized it was Julien that was kissing me. My girlfriend was waking me up with kisses, my God. "Julien, please," I sighed. She was hovering over me with the biggest smile on her face.

"Good morning, baby!" I chuckled at how giddy she was. I took my arms and wrapped them around her, she let out a small scream as I flipped her down next to me.

"Morning," I brush a few strands of hair out of her face before kissing the corner of her mouth.

"How about you try again, I think you missed a little bit," Julien pointed to her lips. I playfully rolled my eyes and then gave in. I love the feeling of her lips on mine, anything Julien did I loved.

'I love you," I made eye contact with her. I feel like I'm not sincere enough with her. "Love is such an interesting thing for me, I thought I was in love with someone but I was conditioned out of fear to feel that way. I didn't think I'd ever be able to truly feel love in my life but you've shown me that I'm deserving of love. The way you touch me, I know it's because you love me and not for my body, you've treated me with grace and respect. I love you."

Julien's eyes welled up with tears, shit I didn't mean to make her cry. "Honey, don't cry!" I pulled her onto my chest, running my fingers through her hair.

"I love you so much. I'm not very good at relationships, I've always been told that I'm the one that fucks them up so for you to say that, really means a lot," she spoke. I gently wiped the small tears that fell from her eyes.

"You could never fuck us up, let's be real. I drove to Tennessee the last time you stopped talking to me. It's gonna take a hell of a lot more to get rid of me," I chuckled as I kissed her cheek.

"I still can't believe you did that, I guess to be fair I flew out here to see you. We just get desperate to see each other I guess," Julien repositioned herself so she was right next to me, instead of on top of me. She kissed my hand, then my lips.

"Oh my God, my entire For You Page on tiktok is you. I'm not complaining though, I'll see a video of you on stage touching the mic stand and I'm like "She touches me like that, I win,"" My quiet room filled up with our laughter.

"You're ridiculous!" Her giggles stopped, and her face got red. "Oh shit, I do touch you like I touch a mic stand, huh?"

"Yes! You put your hands on my hips and you run them up and down my sides. You touch me like a mic stand and I fuckin' love it!"

"Oh you do?" she raised one of her eyebrows.

"Yes, I do," I placed my finger under her chin and kissed her lips. "I don't have work today, would you like to go to the dance studio?"

Julien lit up, "Yes! Oh my God, will you dance for me?" With her pretty smile, and her begging eyes, how could I say no?

"Fine, I'll dance for you. I'm as good as I used to be but I'll try," I agreed, only because of how happy she got. Sometimes, she reminds me of a happy Golden Retriever.

"You'll do amazing, you always do! What styles of dance were you best at?"

"Lyrical and Hip Hop, the complete opposite dance styles. I was a turner like I could turn for so long without stopping. Ugh, I'm so nervous!"

"You'll do amazing, you won so much that you can't just forget all of it. Stretching will be your best friend and it might take you a few tries but you'll get it," Julien kissed my cheek.

We stayed in bed for about thirty minutes, because I didn't wanna let go of her. Cuddling was something that I never got to do very often and now that I have a loving partner, I had a reason to do it without scrutiny.

Eventually, though, we made it out of the door. We both changed and under my clothes was dance wear, wearing it for the first time in a while.

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a/n: Only two more chapters in Act Two before Act Three! What's been your favorite moment so far?

(Also just as a warning, my dancing knowledge isn't the best considering that it's been years since i danced.)

-A