My Little Vampire

17

BILLS POV

I looked at Toms sleeping body. His red puffy face and the oversized clothing he wore.
I sat up, walking out of room. Closing the door behind me, the soft white clouds filled the sky.
It was gonna rain soon, I twisted the doorknob that lead me to enter Liliths room.
She sat there. Looking down, crisscross on her bed, her headphones blocking the sounds of my approach.

LILITHS POV

I snapped out of my trance as he opened the door. I sat up straight removing my bluetooth headphones and turning them off.
"Hey Bill" I turned the song off.
"Hey, uhm I need to talk to you." He shut the door behind him. He sighed as he walked over to me, he sat at the edge of my bed.

"I don't mean this in a bad way. But, why do you keep asking about my childhood? Not just me but everyones." He placed his hands on his lap, staring into my eyes.
My eyes widened as I come up with a response.
"Well, you guys know about my childhood. I tell you everything." I gulp.

"Well, can you just not bring it up anymore." His German accent pushed through.

"Yea, sorry." I answered. I looked down, disappointed with myself. "It's fine just don't talk about it again." He said as he left.
"Mhm."

I signed, putting my headphones back on snd turning them on. I played my comfort song, Cigarette Daydreams - Cage The Elephants

It's been my favorite sense I was 10.

I leaned my head back. Closing my eyes. Listening to every lyric of the song. No words could express how this song made me feel.
Just comfort.
Like I was alive. Yet dead.
My eyes felt heavy, I layed there. Not drifting off into a sleep though. Tears formed in my eyes, they came rushing down.

Like a car race. Like Ones that I saw that time I went to Tokyo.

I hugged myself, rubbing my cold skin.

You were only 17

That lyric stuck out to me. I was only 17. I opened my eyes and lifted up my oversized shirt. My inner part my shoulder, near my elbow, a tattoo sat there 17.
17 was a beautiful number to me. 7 in general. 7 was my lucky number.

Everything was 7 to me.
I rubbed the tattoo. Remembering everything that happened at such young age. Even if it was 2 years ago, I remember everything like it was yesterday.

The screaming.
The arguing.
The fighting.
The sound of glass being thrown filling the kitchen.
The sound banging I had to hear.
At 17.

At 7 my life went downhill. And now it could never be what I imagined it as a seven year old.

My red puffy eyes and my tear stained face. My wet pillow, drowned in my salty tears.
Even if I moved out just so I could feel better about myself. About my life. It never got better, recently, it's been getting worse.
Because of my stupid fucking negative comments that I convinced myself to believe.

I hugged my pillow tight as the song drifted away, another song coming on.
Even if it was around 4:p.m. I felt so tired. Physically, mentally. I was so obsessed with him. It hurt.
The words "I hate you." From Bill never left my mind. Every night I cried. Cried myself to sleep because my brain thinks he hates me.

He's made it very clear that he 'loves' me.
That won't night that he saved me.

It was a night I wish never happened. I wish he never came back. So I could stay there. And rot as he lives his life, with Tom, Georg and Gustav.

I still think about why he came back for me. And my pity, insecure self.