Buried Ashes (MxM)

28-I Love You

Jackson

A light mist of cold rain fell from the sky as I watched him. From a distance, Liam sat in the fetal position on the grass in front of Luca's grave.

I held no envy. No jealousy due to the love he held in his heart for his deceased mate. He had built a life with Luca. They had two beautiful children together. It was all ripped away from them in a second. 

After holding his head down to his knees for what felt like hours, Liam stood. He walked back to me, and I, wordlessly, followed him as we walked back home. 

Ben and I thought it best that Liam did not visit Luca unaccompanied. We had to take care of our fragile mate. So, I came with him while Ben stayed home with the children.

He and Ben seemed to bond so quickly; so perfectly. It pained me that it wasn't the same for Liam and I.

Once we reached the front steps to our home, Liam's legs seemed to weigh a ton as he dragged himself to the front door. He held his hand on the door knob for a moment before turning it. I knew what this was. He didn't want his daughter to see this haggard, worn down version of himself. He was forcing himself into a mindset to put on a smile for Amelia.

Once the door opened, it was moments after Liam and I walked in that we heard the small slaps of footsteps on the floor as well as a squeal of delight. Rounding the corner, Amelia was running full speed toward her father, with a slower Ben in tow.

"Dada!"

Liam crouched and held his arms open wide. Amelia crashed into him, and squeezed his neck while he held her close.

"Hey, baby. Were you good, hm?" Liam asked as he greeted her. Amelia quickly nodded in response.

"Love Bennie!" she exclaimed, and it was no surprise to the three of us. She had made this declaration several times already. The first time brought Ben to tears.

I walked toward Ben, who was admiring Amelia with a smile on his face while he held Max. I leaned down, and placed a kiss to his forehead. Max cooed at me, so I kissed his little curls.

"I can take him, baby. Let you have a break," I told Ben as I held my arms open for the baby.

"Oh, thanks Jax," Ben murmured with a tired smile as he passed Max to me. I walked several feet away, to an area where Amelia had already returned to her toys. Though I wasn't beside them, I could still hear my mates, and see them in my peripheral vision.

Liam walked toward Ben, and wrapped his arms around the latter. Ben's arms encircled Liam's waist as they just held each other. No words were needed. The embrace spoke enough of the love they held for each other. Liam needed it, after visiting Luca's grave. 

I could have given him that loving reassurance, but we just weren't at that place yet.

A busy evening followed, as we fed and bathed the children, and tried to do the same for ourselves. I made no move to make it known that I had noticed how little Liam ate at dinner time.

When it came time to put Amelia and Max to bed, Liam and I were in the nursery. We had a newly installed toddler bed for Amelia put in the room.

Liam was murmuring words to Amelia as he knelt beside her bed, while I held Max and swayed in place.

Once Amelia and Max were asleep, Liam and I walked toward the door. We both reached for the door handle at the same time, and brushed hands.

Tingles immediately spread like wildfire across my skin at the contact. Guessing by Liam's gasp, he felt the same thing.