A Turn For The Better (Completed)

Part 20

The rest of the day wasn't too bad. I managed to pay attention in class and even got to the library to make a start on McGonagall's essay. I didn't dare bring up Malfoy again until that evening. We were sitting in the common room doing professor Binns' homework. "I've been thinking guys. " I said to them. They both looked up from what they were doing. "Well today I saw Malfoy, and he was actually helping a first year. A Hufflepuff boy. He was lost and Malfoy offered to show him where to go. And giving him advice. What if Malfoy really is trying to, redeem himself." I tried not to show how eager I was. I think I succeeded. "Really? Malfoy helping a Hufflepuff? Must of hit his head during the war!" Ron laughed. Harry also laughed at this joke. As I didn't want to sound like I was in Malfoy's corner, I replied, "Well probably. But it seems like it was a good thing! I haven't heard one bad thing since being back here." "Hermione, its only been one week. Give it another three days and that same Hufflepuff boy will be in tears over something Malfoy said." added Harry. It seemed that trying to convince the two boys would be a lost cause tonight, so I dropped it and went back to my homework.

When I finished my homework I was exhausted. I said goodnight to the boys and went to my dormitory. Ginny was already in bed, reading the quibbler. "I didn't know you read the quibbler, Ginny." I said to her. "I didn't, I don't actually. There's just a quiz in here that I want to do. Just for fun." "Oh I love those quizzes. They do be fun! What is it?" "Its what occupation are you most suitable for? I am so confused about what to do when I graduate this year. I can't believe I won't be going back to Hogwarts next year!" she said sadly. "Ginny, honestly that is months away! This is only our first week back! Don't be worrying, you aren't the only one confused." I tried reassuring her. She gave me a smile, "You're right Hermione. I always worry myself over these things. I am going to try enjoy this year!" "That's the spirit!"

She put the quibbler away and turned to me. "So, whats been on your mind?" "What do you mean?" I asked her. "There's no point in denying it, Hermione. We've all noticed the way you have been the past week. And I am now in most of your classes. What's going on with you?" I didn't know whether I should say anything or not. I wanted to talk to someone about it, but I didn't want to tell her our secret. Not that I didn't want to tell her, I did, but I couldn't. "I've just had a lot on my own mind. I'm confused about things. It feels like, there's something that I want, but I'm not allowed have. Because people might not approve, as of course, so much is always expected of me." I didn't mean to let all of that out, but for the most part, it was true. "Hermione, you should be yourself. I wouldn't judge you for wanting something. I hardly doubt Harry or Ron would either. I know you don't want to talk specifically about it yet, but whenever you need to talk, I'm here. I always am." "Thank you Ginny. I know I can count on you, as you can on me. But I'll be fine, I just need to learn how to want things for myself. I have spent the past few years trying to work things for three people. It's hard. I care about Harry and Ron, I do, but sometimes I feel like I have to have their say before I can do anything." "Hermione, Ron and Harry know how much you care about them. You fought alongside Harry, traveled all over England to make sure he was okay. And you were there for Ron when Fred died. And throughout many other things, you were always there for him. There is no way possible, that they don't know how much you care about them. They won't hate you for doing something for yourself. Lord knows you need to."

Ginny seemed to put things into perspective for me. I secretly wondered did she know what I was actually talking about? "You are brilliant, Ginny. Thank you for listening to me rant. I don't think I do that enough, hence why I am like this now!" "Anytime, your like the sister I never had." She came over and hugged me. With that she jumped back into her bed and said "Goodnight, Hermione." "Goodnight, Ginny."

That night I had a similar dream to the one the night before we returned to Hogwarts. Only this time everyone seemed to hate me. The whole school thought I had gone crazy. Malfoy was telling everyone that I cared for nobody. I was hurting my friends because I lied about me and Malfoy. I was hurting Malfoy because I hadn't gotten around my friends. All the Slytherins were on Malfoy's side, including teachers! Everybody else took Harry and Ron's side! They all looked down upon me, calling me hurtful names, telling me I was not doing what was expected of me.

I woke up in a sweat, again crying. Ginny had helped me last night, but I really needed to get around them all soon. I couldn't handle it at all. If I couldn't convince them that Malfoy was a good person, then I would just have to tell them the truth, and face the consequences, because I didn't want to lie to them anymore.

As I had been everyday since we got back, I was the first one up in the Gryffindor common room. I went through my usual routine, shower, dressing, leaving a note for the boys, and went down to breakfast. Being up so early had got its benefits. I could get my homework done in peace. So I sat out by the lake that morning writing the final paragraph for McGonagall's homework.

"Hi there." came a dreamy voice. "Oh, hi Luna, how are you?" "I've been good. How have you been?" "Me? Oh well, I've been alright. Actually there was something I wanted ask you Luna." I decided I might as well see if she knew anything. "Go ahead." "Well, the other day, on the train. You said you knew that I had met a boy, and I was just_" "Wondering if I knew who the boy was?" she finished. "Um, yeah. " I replied. "Yes, I know who it is, and I also know that some people might not approve. But like I said, your secret is safe with me." I unexpectedly felt a little relieved. Someone knew, though she would never tell. "Anyway, I'd best be going, I need to find my shoes. Someone has been hiding them again." I looked down and sure enough she was bare footed. "Okay Luna, thank you, for not saying anything." "Your very welcome, Hermione." She bounded off, skipping her way back to the castle. I finished the essay and headed back to the castle, to see if I could catch Harry and Ron before class. I wanted to talk with them.

As I walked into the great hall, I spotted the two of them just getting up from the table. "Harry, Ron, can I speak with you both before class?" "Yeah, sure Hermione, whats up?" asked Harry. "Not here, this is a matter between the three of us." I said. They looked at each other and followed me. We found an empty classroom on the first floor. "Hermione, whats wrong?" Harry asked as we entered the classroom. "There's nothing wrong, not really. I just want to ask you both something." "Well then ask us, we're going to be late for class!" intervened Ron. "We're not going to be late, we still have fifteen minutes!" I pointed out. "Right, this is difficult, as I know how you feel about this person. But I am just going to come out and ask. Malfoy has asked me to help him with something." The two of them shot glances at each other and then gaped open mouthed at me. Finally Ron managed to ask, "Help him? What could Malfoy possibly want your help with? He made it clear the past seven years that he hates you!" "Wait, Hermione you said you had something to ask us. What are you trying to ask us? asked Harry. "Well, this is the difficult part. I wanted to know, how you would feel, if I...accepted to help him?" They looked shocked, horrified perhaps. "Why would you even consider that Hermione?" inquired Ron. "I'm with Ron on that." said Harry. I was scared now, I would have to tell them the truth. Well as much as I could.

"For the past almost two weeks, Malfoy has been trying to convince me that he wants to be a good person. He's been apologizing to me, for everything, telling me why he acted how he did and that he chose me to help him because I am the only person he knows that could help him." "And you believed him?" asked Ron in horror. "Yes, Ronald, I did. You might have too if you saw the way he was. I know he has done some pretty bad stuff to us, and to others, but everybody deserves a chance if they seek the help." "Hermione, you said almost two weeks? How can that be? We're only back four days." quizzed Harry. Oh god, why did I say that? "Er, yes, nearly two weeks. When we were in Diagon Alley, while you were talking to Jason and Katie, I went to Flourish and Blotts. He was there, alone and he started talking to me. He asked me was it possible for people to forgive him. I told him, it might be if he could show that his intentions were good. And then later I met him in Eeylops. And he asked me then. I told him that I would think about it, that I'd have to be sure you were okay with it." "You secretly met up with Malfoy?" asked Ron, with a hint of disgust in his tone. "No Ron, I didn't secretly meet up with him! I was there and then he was there!" "And so that's why you keep bringing him up? To try and make us see he is a good person. You've already accepted to help him if you're doing that!" accused Harry. "I get why you are mad at me Harry, but you said it yourself. We all need to move on and put the past behind us. That is what he is trying to do! How can he do that if people constantly bring up all the bad about him." "And what if he isn't looking to change Hermione? What if he is just playing along with his father? Trying to take people down from the inside? He is bad news Hermione, always has been, always will be! I would never trust him!" "Believe what you want then Harry. Do you honestly think, that if I even had the slightest doubt, that I would help him? You have never questioned me before, why now? Because you don't like him? Because of his family? Because he is a FORMER death eater? If I thought for one second, that he would try and hurt one hair on either of your heads, that I would let him near you? If you do, then you obviously don't know me!" My voice had risen to shouting range. With tears threatening, I ran from the room to the nearest bathroom.