Single Father (Ziall Horlik) AU

Chapter 1

Zayn's POV

My fuzzy, sleepy head only processed a few things as I warmed up a bottle at two in the morning. Laila was in my arms crying her heart out because she was hungry. I brought her home from the hospital six days ago and haven't slept more than thirty minutes each day. I was just glad the hospital had given me enough formula and diapers to last me a little because I knew my state of mind would be dangerous driving.

"Daddy's got you. Here you go." I mumbled to my daughter as I placed the bottle in her mouth. She immediately stopped crying and started sucking at the bottle. Her blue eyes were trained on me a little until she fell right back to sleep. I walked from the kitchen back to my bedroom and sat on my bed again. My eyes were begging me to go to sleep, but I worried if I did then I would miss Laila's cry if she needed me. So far, parenting was the hardest thing I had ever done and I'd only been at it for a total of seven days. The one day in the hospital made me think it would be easier than this.

I never pictured myself as a father at this point in my life. I'm only twenty-two and trying to piece together how a mother could not want their own child. I know the night I met Perrie I thought she was drop dead gorgeous. I had never felt that rush of wanting someone so badly in my life. So I made my move on her and we both talked over drinks. I thought she was a lovely girl and actually liked her from what I knew of her. Things only escalated from there and she took me to her place. We were drunk and I had no clue if I had used a condom or not. Now I know I didn't, but at the time it didn't even matter. After that night, we had text a little, but with her only telling me she felt sick and asking me if I was sick when we had sex. It turned out that she was pregnant. I was scared at first, but did go to her place to see if she needed anything and we both went together to tell her parents she was pregnant as well as mine. I never really read into her actions as hating our child. I just thought it was me that she didn't like, so Istopped trying to pursue a relationship with her and moved on to just calling her every month to see if she was still doing okay. When she was in labor, I was right by her and felt like we could have a family. Then I held my daughter and I was gone for her. Perrie didn't feel the same and it still baffled me.

It took the new born twenty minutes to finish the full bottle with burping in the middle. I laid her back in her crib that I bought at a thrift store on the way home from the hospital. I wasn't expecting to need to buy all of this baby gear because I didn't think I would become an actual father to this child. Now it's only me in a two bedroom flat raising a baby. I tried to make a cute nursery out of the second bedroom, but the doctors told me not to leave her unattended in a a room alone just yet so I have the crib right next to my bed now.

Her room is actually cute for what I could afford. I found some pink baby bedding and stuffed animals to decorate. I found some cute lightly worn baby clothes and a changing table. I thought it looked nice, but I wished I could have made it better for my princess. I also wished I could have had help in getting it together.

I didn't really speak to my family anymore after I told then I got a girl pregnant out of wedlock. They're very religious so that explains allot. My mum had always said if I had a little girl one day when I got married I could have all the things she used for my three sister's nurseries. She also said she would always be there to baby sit whenever. Well, that didn't happen at all because things didn't happen the way she had wanted them. Now I'm using up all my vacation days, sick days, and personal days at work so I can try getting on my feet as a father. They won't give me maternity leave because well, I'm only a father and I didn't carry the child in me for nine months and give birth to it.

My eyes drooped shut as I tried my hardest not to worry too much about how I was going to get by. I had an alright job working as an office assistant at a pharmaceutical company. I just really needed to make sure I could take Laila with me to work when all my days have been used up because if not I would be out of a job. That would make taking care of a baby really hard.